Live and Don’t Think About Tomorrow
by alena-chan
Summary: [AU] Since the suicide of her father, Raven Roth lives an organized and unemotional life. But everything seems to change with the new neighbour, Richard Grayson.
1. Silent Night

_**Yes, I'm reposting this story… since I got many mails telling me to do so and this story is one of my favourite stories… so, it's back!**_

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_**Summary:** Since the suicide of her father, Raven Roth lives an organized and unemotional life. But everything seems to change with the new neighbour, Richard Grayson. With his charm and wits he is able to get her out of her shell. But Richard seems to have a secret – a secret which could break Raven's heart all over again._

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_Enjoy the story!_

_**Disclaimer: I don't own anything!**_

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**_Live and Don't Think About Tomorrow_**

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_**Prologue:**_

**_1. Silent Night_**

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The Roth - household was filled with silence, the dark halls and bedrooms.

As the clock changed from 2:59 a.m, a shot rang out and everything instantly changed.

It was a December morning. When everyone had gone to bed the previous night, everyone expected the next morning would be filled with fighting over the bathroom, begging for an extra dessert in their lunch bags. No one could have imagined the lights, the sirens, the tears. For the Roth family, one minute changed their lives forever.

Raven the eldest daughter, she was 17, was asleep in her bedroom, her headset still on, although her CD had quit playing hours ago. A history book was lying open on her chest, and she was still dressed as she had been for school the previous day. The cordless phone was sitting beside her left arm; she had been waiting for a call when she fell asleep.

Josh the 1O year old boy and Mira the five year old little was peacefully asleep, their dreams full of Christmas, which were only a few weeks away. They were both wearing long sleeved pajama sets, and Mira had an extra blanket on her bed. As 3:00 approached, she rolled over to her other side, but did not awake.

Lastly, the bedroom of Arella and Brad Roth. The gentle hum of the heater lulled Arella to sleep, and she was sleeping with smile on her faces, not knowing that shortly, she would never feel this way again.

Brad Roth sat on the other side of their bed, tears pouring silently down his face.

He was depressed, though he wasn't sure exactly why, and as time passed, the more out of control he felt. It was as if the world was swallowing him, piece by piece, and it was already up to his neck. He had the world to be happy for. He had a wonderful wife, three wonderful children he loved more than everything, he was a successful lawyer.

But he still felt empty inside. Like he'd never be happy again. He thought this feeling would pass, but it had been months and it hadn't. He kept up appearances, but even that was being burdensome on him now. He was irritable with his children siblings, with his wife, with his clients, and he had no logical reason why.

His hand shook as she held up the gun. His wife would never allow keeping a gun in the house; he brought it from a man in the streets two days earlier.

He had no intention of using it; it was an impulse decision, now he guessed it was his subconscious at work. Part of him was screaming inside, it couldn't be this bad. Nothing was so bad that life had to end. But the other part was screaming that this depression, this misery wasn't going to be temporary, he was going to be like this forever, unsatisfied, stuck in a downhill spiral, just getting worse and worse until his entire life was miserable anyway. Without thinking, without justifying her actions, he lifted the gun to his head and pulled the trigger, just as the clock changed to 3:00.

The shot is what initially awoke the Roth family from their dreams, everyone's eyes popped open, startled by the noise. No one really moved until they heard Arella's terrified screams.

Arella's eyes had opened once she heard the click of the gun, just in time to see the tears on her husband's face, the look of horror as he pulled the trigger, and the blood that followed the shot. She let out several terrified, bone-chilling screams, although later she wouldn't remember this.

Brad Roth had instantly fallen, blood spraying the bedspread and wall.

His eyes were open and lifeless, his face barely recognizable after the impact from the bullet.

Arella was crying hysterically by the time anyone appeared in her doorway, covered in Brad's blood as she tried to find a pulse, tried to bring him back. She knew it was pointless, that nothing could be changed, but to admit it would be to accept it, and there was no way her husband could be gone, just like that.

Raven was the first to appear in the doorway, and as her pale face registered what was going on, she screamed loudly in pain, while blocking Josh's and Mira's doorway so they couldn't witness what was going on.

Raven pushed Mira and Josh into their bedrooms, "You can't go out there."

"What's going on?" Josh asked his face full of concern, "What happened?"

"Mom will tell you in a bit, first, I need both of you to sit down on Josh's bed and read a book. Josh, would you please read to Mira?" Raven asked, his voice shaking, her blood pumping so fast that she felt like she was going to faint. "Whatever you do, do not leave this room, do you understand me?"

"But what's going on? Why is mum screaming?" Mira asked, her eyes wide with fear, "Raven, I'm scared."

Raven kissed her forehead gently, "Don't be scared, okay kiddo? There's nothing to be scared of. Just stay in here and read a book, okay? Josh, I'm trusting you to be the big brother and do as I'm asking."

Josh, feeling honored to be entrusted like this from Raven and agreed, and in a very business-like tone, he took the book Raven offered to him and started reading out loud to his little sister.

"Josh? What's going on?" Mira asked softly, her eyes filled with tears, "I'm scared."

Josh wrapped an arm around her tightly, "It's probably no big deal. Don't cry, and don't be scared, everything's okay, Raven would have told us if it was something major."

Raven walked back into the hallway and she grabbed the phone on the nightstand, calling 911, and through silent tears, telling them she needed an ambulance immediately.

"He's gone." Arella choked out and then like nothing seriously happened, like she was another person she ordered calmly "Raven, take Josh and Mira into your bedroom. I'll wait for an ambulance."

Raven didn't move, and the room was silent "Now!" Arella barked, and the room sprang into action.

Raven, who had tears streaming down her face as well, her body numb and tingling, walked to Josh's and Mira's bedrooms and brought them to hers.

Raven laid on her bed, staring at the ceiling, tears still silently streaming down her face. It had been nearly two hours since she had awoken to see her father, sprawled out on her bed, lifeless, and she hadn't been able to stop the tears since. She had given up on trying talking to Josh or Mira, who had fallen asleep immediately.

She couldn't believe this was happening, her father was level-headed, he was calm and collected, most of the time, and he had a good sense of what was right and what was wrong.

The more she thought of it, the more she was certain that this couldn't be happening. Things like this didn't happen to her family, there was no way that just a few hours ago, she was eldest daughter of Brad Roth, and now not.

She'd wake up shortly to her alarm blaring music and find out this was just an awful nightmare. Her father couldn't be gone; she couldn't have a life without a father. The family wasn't the same without him. He was the one who had held them together. He was the one who assured them to let out all of their feelings and to share them.

As hard has she tried to deny what had happened, she knew that she was wrong.

If her father were still alive, if he didn't just kill herself, why did she have this lead sensation in her stomach? Why did she feel so...lonely? Why did she want to just curl into a ball and cry forever? This was real. This was happening. What was going to happen next? How could they move on from this? How could things ever go back to normal again?

She looked down at her siblings, who were lying on her bed

Things couldn't be normal again, they'd never be normal. They'd all remember this moment for the rest of their lives, a dark cloud over any future happiness.

How was her mum going to sleep in that room again, knowing what happened?

How would any of them even enter? How would they live in this house?

What would happen at school, at their neighborhood, will they all know what happened?

Will it change anything? Will anybody be affected by the death of her father? Probably not!

How could one person be so important in one place, and so meaningless in another?

She felt like she was going to throw up, although she made no motion to move, and was glad then the feeling subsided. She had never felt emotion this powerful before, this gut-wrenching and horrible. Sure, she was sad when her grandmother died, but that was nothing compared to this. This was her father.

She was his daughter, how could she have not known he was depressed? Suicidal? How could she have missed this?

Would she ever feel like herself again? Would she ever feel anything but this pain she was feeling now? Would she ever be able to smile again, to feel happy again?

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_**Two years later**_

"Raven, would you please wake up Josh! He has to get ready for school!" a voice yelled from downstairs waking up a purple-haired woman.

Raven yawned and stretched slowly tangling her bare legs down her bed.

Her bare feet impacted with the cold floor and while she walked through her room towards the door kicking the clothes which where lying on the floor out of her way she shoot a glance at the mirror on her wall. She sighed at her reflection. She looked like shit. Her hair was messed up and there were dark rings round her amethyst eyes. As always she couldn't sleep well. Since tow years she wasn't able to sleep well.

Raven tore her glance away from her reflection ad walked out of her room to the room next to hers.

She knocked at the door slightly but opened it with a loud thud.

"Josh, wake up!" she yelled loudly to her 12 year old brother causing him to jump off from his bed.

Raven smirked at his dumfounded expression.

"I expect you downstairs in 10 minutes. Any minute later and you have to walk to school!" she said leaving his room before a sailing shoe could hit her.

"Stupid witch!" the brown haired boy said drowsily.

"I heard that!" His sister's sharp voice haled through his room.

Josh Roth rolled his honey-brown eyes. Raven always heard everything.

He crawled from his bed and searched some clothes he could put on. He eventually found a dark blue pair of jeans and a black shirt.

Putting on his socks he searched for his homework on his desk as his eyes fell on his calendar.

'_One more week. One more week until…' _the young boy shock his head and gathered his papers and books and grabbed his bag and walked downstairs to the big and clear kitchen.

Raven was already sitting on the table and drinking her usual cup of herbal tea and eating her slice of buttered toast.

Arella Roth stood in front of the stove and prepared tons of pancakes.

"Morning!" Josh mumbled and sat down on the breakfast table.

"Morning, darling!" Arella said cheerily.

Raven and Josh exchanged a glance. Both of them didn't know how her mother managed to be so joyful and happy day by day.

The night of the death of her husband was the last time they saw or heard her crying. She was always smiling – always happy. It was ridiculous.

Raven and josh had preferred if Arella had cried but this happy family façade was too much to take for both of them. But they played along nonetheless. Mostly because of their little sister…

"Mira sweetheart, please sit down and eat your pancakes. Do you want some juice?" Arella asked the black-haired girl with green eyes who walked down the stairs.

The girl sat down and only nodded.

Raven let out the breath she was holding. Every day was the same. Everyday the same hope that this time Mira would speak. But no single words came from Mira's lips. She refused to speak. For two years Mira didn't say a word. Since the fateful night she didn't talk, didn't cry, didn't scream.

And everything because of that night. Everything because of a cruel, selfish act.

Raven was angry – really angry! She closed her eyes.

'_Calm down Raven! You know, emotions are useless. They are only causing pain. You don't need any emotions. You don't need them!'_

She opened her eyes and stood up from her chair. "Josh, Mira we are leaving now!" she said in her monotone voice.

She grabbed her bag and took Mira's hand and left the house from the kitchen door which led to the backyard. Josh hastily swallowed the last piece of his toast and followed his sisters out.

Arella watched their children leave through the window. She heard the motor of the car roaring. She watched the car driving away before she fell on the floor and began to sob uncontrollably. Tears were streaming down from her dark-blue eyes to her cheeks. She silently sobbed and silently cried out the pain she had to hide from her children.

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"You know Raven, you should really wear something else than black or purple. I could borrow you my new pink shirt. The one I brought yesterday at…"

"First of all Kori: I don't wear pink! So never ever again suggest that I should wear pink. Do you understand? Secondly, what is wrong with the way I look?" Raven asked her friend and looked down at herself. She was wearing a long black skirt and black boots and a dark purple sweater. Her long violet hair was up in a ponytail.

Raven looked back at her friend and for the millionth time she wondered how such completely different persons could be such good friends.

Kori Anders was a red-haired, emerald-eyed, happy, joyful, sometimes naïve, tall, slender, young woman. She was dressed in white pants and a pink tight shirt which revealed her belly button and parts of her flat stomach. Her long red hairs hung openly down her back.

She wore a smile for everyone who would come across her way. She was always happy, always smiling. She was what people would call sunshine.

Raven on the other hand was a purple-haired, amethyst-eyed, dark, mysterious, curvaceous, quite, exotic-beautiful woman. Raven's face rarely showed a smile.

A vicious grin? Yes! A small chuckle? Sometimes! A smile? Once in a million time! A laugh? Never!

Kori gave her friend a big smile while continuing their walk through the campus.

"No Raven, there is nothing wrong with your clothes. I just thought that a change would be good. That's all! But, have you seen Garfield? I thought he wanted to meet us!"

Raven turned her body to her friend Kori and began walking backwards while talking with Kori.

"He is waiting in the library. He wanted to meet us there. But you know how he is. He probably met a pretty girl and is now trying to impress her and totally forgetting about us. He… aaah!"

Raven hadn't paid any attention where she was waling or in what she was walking. So she didn't see the puddle of coke spilled at the pavement.

As soon as her feet made contact with the fluid she lost her balance and sailed backwards towards the hard pavement.

Raven closed her eyes and waited for the hard impact – which never came.

Instead, she found two strong arms being wrapped around her waist.

It felt strangely comfortable… she felt comfortable in these arms.

But nonetheless she struggled herself free from the strong arms and turned around to look into a face with two dark-blue eyes and a heart-melting smile.

The face belonged to a handsome young man who had black spiky hair.

Raven found herself staring at the face of this handsome man.

It lasted some seconds before she realized how close they were. She was practically laying in his arms. She blinked and took some steps away from the man.

Usually she would knock the stuffing off every guy who dared to come closer to her than a meter but this guy had saved her from a big embarrassment. So she thought it would be appropriate to thank him before screaming at him.

But before Raven could say anything she heard the guy speaking.

"Wow, I always knew that I was adorable and I am used that women are drooling over me, but I didn't know that I am so gorgeous that they would fall on their knees for me!" he grinned mischievously. "Vic, you should have told me much sooner that there are beautiful women her in Jump City who are literally falling from heaven. I would have moved here sooner!" The spiky haired man looked at his tall, athletic African-American companion who was standing next to him.

Raven glared at the confident young man and hissed angrily. "I am not falling on my knees for you! You arrogant jerk! And believe me you are not gorgeous!" with that she grabbed Kori's arm who had watched this scene bemused.

"Ts, ts, ts! She is not only beautiful but also impolite. I mean a 'Thank you' would be appropriate, wouldn't it?" He said still smiling.

Raven let her arms fall to her sides and faced the smiling young man. And with a forced smile which more looked like a grimace she said.

"Thank you for catching me…"

"Richard – my name is Richard Grayson!" he interrupted her.

Raven glared at him hoping her eyes would send a deadly beam and kill him.

"Thank you for catching me, _Richard_!" she repeated and then turned around and stormed away.

"Raven, wait!" Kori yelled after her friend but before following her she gave the two young men an apoplectic smile.

"Raven? That's her name! It's…nice!" Richard mumbled and smiled.

"Uh, uh, Rich! I know this smile and it means nothing good. Don't do anything you will regret. Don't hurt her and yourself!" Victor reasoned.

"Don't worry! I will just help her!" Richard answered back his gaze never leaving Raven's disappearing figure.

Victor Stone shock his head. Something told him that it won't be just helping and that he should be worried but he couldn't argue with Richard. Not now.

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"Arrogant, vain ass! That's what he was! I should have kicked his ass. Argh!" Raven fumed as she and Kori entered the large library.

"Shhh!" a woman whispered putting her index finger on her lips.

Raven shot her a death glare and the woman hide herself behind a bookshelf.

"Raven, I think you should calm down. I don't see why are so mad. I merely found him annoying. He was kind of nice and…charming! I think you should have been nicer and…" Kori trailed off as she saw Raven's face turning red and she was more than happy to see their friend Garfield Logan waving his hands.

"Dudes, I am over here!"

They walked to the table Garfield was sitting at. Raven took a place across Garfield and Kori sat down next to him.

"Garfield, will you ever grow up!" Raven said in her sarcastic tone and looked causally at her friend.

Garfield Logan was good looking young man. He had blond hairs and green eyes. He was not really muscular but nonetheless he had a nice body. And although Raven didn't like to admitted but he could be funny at times. But she never would tell him that. Raven, Kori and Garfield had been friends since High School and this two are the only people who get to know her – at least they know her better than any other person.

"I will grow up when you stop being so moody and dark!" Garfield shot back.

"Friends, please stop this!" Kori said pacifying.

"Whatever!" Garfield said rolling his eyes.

"You know what! I just met this hot chick Terra and she asked me if I wanted to come to her party tonight and…"

"… and of course you couldn't disappoint her and said yes!" Raven finished his sentence.

"Yeah and I wanted to ask you guys if you want to come along?"

Kori's face lit up in anticipation. "That's wonderful. I will definitely come with you. Raven, you should come as well. We will have much fun!"

Raven shock her head. "As much as the thought of partying with a bunch of drunk and brainless people delights me I have to say no!"

"But Rave…" Garfield began to protest but was cut short by Raven.

"No, Gar! I don't want to come. I hate parties! End! Anyway, do you have learned-"

Garfield didn't really listen to the conversation Raven and Kori had began.

He really wanted Raven to come along. He wanted to see her have fun. Of all people she is the one who deserve to be happy and have fun. But unfortunately she had buried her self behind an emotionless mask. But more than anything else Garfield wanted to see the mask fall.

But no matter what he tried to make her happy nothing seemed to help. But he wasn't a man who would give up that easily. And one day he will be successful.

With this thought he joined his two friends in their conversation.

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"Mum, I am back!" Raven yelled through the house as she entered the kitchen from backyards.

"We are in the living-room!" her mother yelled back and Raven walked to the living room.

"You know mum, today I met a … ahh!" Raven let out a yelp at the sight in the living room.

She glared at the sofa where a smiling Richard Grayson was leaning back.

"What are YOU doing here?"

"Sitting", he said and smiled at her which Annoyed her to the top. What was wrong with him?

"Do you have a Tracker on me or something!" she said loudly and threw her things to the side. "I can't believe that you followed me and…"

"Actually honey. This is our new neighbour, Richard Grayson and I invited him to stay for dinner", Arella said to her daughter.

Raven blushed. She was an even bigger idiot than she thought.

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**_So, how do you like it? _**

**_Ok, most of you already know the story, but it would be still nice if you leave me a review… no matter how long the review is… you know, I'm practically begging here and just for you to know, I'm on my knees… ok, I'll stop here…_**

_**Until later,**_

_**Alena**_


	2. One simple question

_**A/N: **Yay, I'm back… with another chapter… yup, I know I'm good… ok, I will make it short…_

_Thanks to everyone who had reviewed for the first chapter and to everyone who put this story to her or his Favourites/Alerts List… you guys are the best and I LOVE YOU… he, he, he... you know what I mean...  
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_This chapter is dedicated to **Cherry Jade**, **Lain the Fluff-Master**, **Mol**, **Tecna **and _**_Raven of the Night676_****_…_**

_**Disclaimer: I don't own them!**_

_Ok, enjoy the chapter!_

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**_2. One simple question_**

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Maybe it was the fact that Raven was throwing daggers at Richard from her eyes or that Josh seemed to worship Richard, but the dinner was not what you'd call a "success"...

At least not for Raven.

Richard couldn't help but mess with her; she had been steamed when she saw that he was  
there.

"Why did you invite him?" she had asked angrily as she sat down. It didn't matter for her that she was impolite. He had quickly taken the seat across from her much to her dismay.

Now here they were all quietly eating the beautifully prepared meal.

Ok, only Raven was quietly eating her meal. Everybody else seemed to be engrossed in a conversation with the wonderful Richard Grayson. Her mother was charmed by him and was constantly laughing and even Mira had smiled at him.

"A beautiful flower for a beautiful girl," he had said and handed Mira a simple, white daisy and to Raven's utter surprise Mira had taken it and had smiled at him. Mira, who usually was alienated by strangers, had smiled at this arrogant, smug jerk.

And as much as she disliked him she was more than happy to see that Mira had come out a bit of her apathetic state. So she had suppressed the urge to throw up at his cheesy line and dismissed the wink he had given her.

Most annoying for Raven was that Josh seemed to adore him. He hung on his lips like he was a hero or something like that. It was just ridiculous. They were now talking about sports.

"But do you know what I really want to do?" Josh asked and took a sip from his water. "I would really like to try material arts."

Raven raised an eyebrow. "Material arts?" She said disbelievingly. Raven hated sports, especially team-sports. She was more for meditating. Meditating helped you to calm down; meditating helped you to suppress unnecessary emotions where sport brought out emotions.

"Yes, material arts," Josh repeated and returned his attention to Richard who seemed thoughtful. "I wish I could learn it!"

"You can!" Richard said and for a moment Raven thought he had given her a look. "I know material arts and if you want to I can teach you. It's not that difficult. I have a combat room in my house, so…"

"That would be great. No, that would be fantastic. I …" Josh beamed.

"No, that's a stupid idea." Raven said and everybody looked at her surprised. And to say the truth she was not less surprised about her words. She didn't want to sap it out loud but somehow she didn't like the idea of this jerk teaching Josh.

Josh glared at her angrily. "And why should that be a stupid idea?" he asked me.

"Because…" she began. She desperately searched for an answer. Her mind was wheeling and turning. She had to say something. Anything so that she wouldn't stand like a fool in front of this jerk.

"Because it's dangerous!" she finally said and mentally cursed herself for this lame answer. And it didn't make it better to hear Richard laughing.

"What's so funny about that?" Raven snapped at him.

"Nothing," he answered and looked bemused and Raven wished she could smack off his stupid smile from his face. "But you know I won't kill him. I will just show him some moves. Nothing dramatic. You can come too, if you want. I think I could teach you a lot."

Now Raven was seething and everybody could either see it or could feel it. "You arrogant son of -"

"Raven!" Arella said in a threatening tone. She knew her daughter and the outburst which would come and it would be everything but nice.

"It's really nice that you worry about your brother but I don't see a reason why he shouldn't try it. And I think Mr. Grayson will be careful. So you can drop it!" her tone softened but you could hear that it had still an edgy and dangerous undertone.

Josh smiled triumphantly at Raven and from the corner of her eyes she could see Richard grinning bemused.

Raven screamed mentally and stood up from the dinning-table. "I think I will go and wash the dishes." She said with a fake sugar-sweet voice and left the room for the kitchen.

Raven knew she was acting childish but this guy was driving her insane and not in a good way. She didn't know why but Richard made her feel so … so … She couldn't describe it. It was bad enough that he made her feel at all.

Raven was getting her anger out of the dishes and thinking about as many different ways as she could come up with killing this ass as she heard the kitchen door being opened.

"Mum, you don't need to help me. You should better be with our wonderful guest and care about him!"

"The guest doesn't need to be cared for." She heard a voice which was definitely not her mother's answering.

She prayed that it wasn't him. Although it was clear that it was him. She turned her head towards the kitchen door and of course she saw Richard leaning at the frame and grinning slyly.

For a moment she thought about putting one of her killing-thoughts into practice but she dismissed the thought for the fact that her mother wouldn't like seeing her daughter torture their neighbour. She couldn't ruin her life because of such an idiot.

So she decided to just ignore him and continuing her work.

"I just wanted to help you with the dishes," he said after a while and came closer to her until he was standing next to her.

She looked at him for a moment and then handed him the dishcloth.

"You dry," Raven commanded.

Richard starred at her surprised. "What?" Raven asked and waved the fabric in front of him. "Did you thought I would politely dismiss you offer and tell you that you don't have to do it? No, if you want to help you will. That's the least you can do, anyway."

He laughed and reached out his hand for the dishcloth taking it from her.

He began to dry the dishes she handed him.

"What do you think about conversing while we do the dishes?" he asked.

"Not much." Raven deadpanned.

"Why?"

"Because conversations are pointless and meaningless. It would just hinder us and everything would take us longer than it had to." Raven replied getting slightly annoyed by his questions.

"Maybe, but wouldn't it more amusing to talk while doing the work?" he said and looked at her.

"I don't think so!"

"But-" he began but was cut short by Raven.

"I would advise you to shut up and dry the dishes." She said between clenched teeth.

He chuckled. "You are not a patient or conversable person, are you?"

"Wow, how sharp from you to notice this. I am amazed." Raven sarcastically said. "And would you now please be quiet."

"I think …"

"You can think? Wonders never cease."

"I think that you wouldn't be so frustrated and impolite if you had a good conversation for once." Richard mused without minding her sarcastic insults.

Raven shot him a death-glare and ignored this.

"Answer me one simple question and I will be quiet." Richard suddenly said with a mysterious glint in his eyes.

"Why should I?" Raven asked crossly.

"Because if you don't I will talk the whole time and now I know how much you hate pointless and meaningless conversations," he answered her with a smug grin.

Raven just glared at him. She had practically played in his hands. She was indeed a fool.

But it wouldn't kill her answering one of his stupid questions, would it? And how she judged him his question would be something like 'What is your favourite color' or 'Do you have a boyfriend'. Stupid, little question everybody wants to know. And she could live with answering those kinds of questions.

At least he would stop babbling and going on her nerves. So why not.

"Ok, I will answer you one question and then you will shut up!" she said.

She turned her face to his and waited for his question. To her surprise he didn't smile. There was no smile, no arrogant grin on his face.

It was strangely pensive and … soft. His stormy blue orbs were locked in her amethyst as they were searching for something. She felt a shiver creeping through her spine and she wanted to tell him that she couldn't wait all night long as he opened his mouth.

And with the softest and gentlest voice she had ever heard he asked her the one, simple question she wasn't able to answer.

"Why don't you ever smile?"

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_**A/N: **So, what do you think? Good? Bad? Tell me and review… now… if you have time and want to…_

_Kudos to **Cherry Jade **for beta-ing this chapter…_

_To answer _**_Daughter Of Life And Death_**_ question: I didn't change this story… at least not much… it's still the same as before. I just add some things that I think would be better, but the concept of the story is the same as before… that's also why updates will come fast…most of the chapters are already written. I hope that answers you question._

_Ok, that was it…_

_Until next chapter…_

_Alena_


	3. 1, 2, 3 Smile

_**A/N: **Yeah, I know, I let you wait far too long for this chapter… bad, Alena, but… yeah, I really don't have any excuses…_

_Btw, some scenes of this story are based on **Kal Ho Naa Ho**. It's a wonderful Bollywood movie and you should definitely watch it, but keep in mind that this story isn't exactly like the movie…_

_Thanks and kudos and much love to my dear** Cherrie-chan **for beta-ing this chapter and being so great and cool! _

_  
Anyway, here is the next chapter…_

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_Dedicated to _**_Raven of the Night676_**, **_And FOREVER_** _ **Mol**, **Tecna**, **Cherry Jade**_

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_**Disclaimer: Not mine!**_

_**Enjoy!**_

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**_Chapter Three:_**

**_1, 2, 3 … Smile!_**

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"_Ok, I'll answer you one question and then you will shut up!" she said._

_She turned her face to his, waiting for his question. To her surprise he didn't smile. No smile, no arrogant grin adorned his face._

_It was strangely pensive and … soft. His stormy blue orbs were locked in her amethyst as they were searching for something. She felt a shiver creeping through her spine and she wanted to tell him that she couldn't wait all night long as he opened his mouth. _

_With the softest gentlest voice she had ever heard, he asked her the one question she wasn't able to answer. _

"_Why don't you ever smile?"_

Raven glared at Richard. She was shocked, unable to answer. She wanted to answer. She wanted to scream, to yell. She wanted to tell him that he was wrong. She wanted him to shut up. But, she didn't have an answer. She just didn't know.

So, she just glared at him, incapable of placating both of them.

"What's your problem?" he asked and never looked away from her.

"Problem?"

"Yes, why do you feel like you have to carry all the problems of the world on your shoulders? Why must that be?" he questioned.

"I-"

"Ssshh! Don't interrupt me! It's impolite," he scolded playfully. "Why do you care so much about your siblings? Why do you try to do everything to make your mother, your friends, happy when you hate your life, Raven?" he asked, the playfulness was gone from his face.

Raven's eyes and her body winced. How did he know so much about her? Where could he have found out?

"Mind your own business. You know nothing about this!" she spat out.

"Not much," he admitted. "But when you look closely at your life, you'll see that you have much to be thankful for. Believe me, there are people with a much worse fate and they're still happy. So why can't you just be happy?

Raven shook her head. "I don't need to hear this crap," she said and took some steps away from him but Richard took her arm and held her back.

"Wait! Don't run away. Just listen to me. You know, you should smile. Live and don't think about tomorrow. You never know what could happen. Just enjoy your life." His eyes seemed to look into her soul and Raven found herself drowning in his deep blue eyes. Becoming drunk, she was unable to look away.

Richard released her arm and smiled mischievously at her. "I'll show you how to smile: Ready? Ok, 1, 2, 3…" with that a lopsided smile appeared on his lips. "You see, it's not that difficult. Ok, now it's your turn. Try it. 1, 2, 3 …" he counted again and stared at her intensively. Raven just crossed her arms and just glared at him.

"You have to try," he insisted and leaned closer to her. Raven leaned back to avoid him, maintaining her staring. "Ok, one more time: 1, 2, 3 … smile!" He said, watching her. Raven continued glaring at him.

Richard leaned back again. "Ok, I give up! You have somehow erased your ability to smile. I think you just can't smile," he threw his hands in the air. Then he leaned his head close to hers, again. Raven could feel his hot breath tickling her sensitive, ivory skin. "But don't worry, with some practice I _will_ teach you to smile again."

Once again Raven backed away, wishing to distance the gap between them… needing to distance the gap between them. She waved her index finger in front of him. "Do you know what your problem is? You think that you're-"

Richard took her hand with one swift motion in his strong hands flashing her, a sexy smile. "I know, I am sexy and irresistible," he predatorily whispered in her ear and then suddenly let go of her hands.

"I think I should leave now. Tell your mother that it was a really … nice dinner." He walked towards the door. As he walked out of the kitchen he turned around and said. "Oh, and don't forget to practice your smiling!" he winked at her and closed the door behind him.

Raven just starred at the door. Her mind was in a mess. She wanted to ignore his words, just forget everything about him. He didn't know her. He knew nothing about her life. She could smile. She could have fun if she wanted to, couldn't she?

Why was she thinking about this all? Why did she get so angry, so uncontrolled when this guy was around her? Why wasn't she able to ignore him like she did with every other people entering her life? Why did she care what he said and thought about her? Why…?

Did she really forget how to smile? This one thought invaded her mind. She could think of nothing else the whole night.

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"He's so cute! Look at his hazel eyes and his hair. He has red hair – just like me. He- HEY!" Kori finally yelled and poked Raven in the shoulder. "You aren't listening. This whole time you didn't listen to me." Kori fumed and looked slightly angrily at Raven. Raven, on the other hand, jerked out of her thoughts by Kori's high shriek. For an instant guilt washed over her face which was soon covered by her usual expressionless mask.

"Kori, I don't need to listen to you. It's always the same. Who's the guy today you fell in love with?" Raven asked sarcastically.

"It's not everyday I fall in love. He-"

"He's something special. The man of your dreams. And you never had met someone this wonderful, handsome … bla, bla, bla." Raven mimicked and rolled her eyes. "Just show me the special guy," she added softly as she saw that Kori looked upset.

Kori extended her hand and her index finger pointed to a red-haired young man with hazel eyes. He was leaning against a wall at the campus, headphones on his ears listening to music, his head softly nodding.

"That's the one?" Raven asked unbelievingly.

"What do you have against him? You never like anyone," she defended herself.

"Kori, I don't need to-"

"Would you please speak a little louder? I can't hear anything!" a voice behind them informed them frustrated.

Shocked, Raven and Kori wrenched their heads around.

"No, not you again." Raven growled and glared openly at the man behind her.

"It's sure nice to see how much you missed me," Richard smiled and walked around the bench on which Raven and Kori were sitting and squeezed himself between the two girls.

Raven poked her index finger into his chest. "You overheard our conversation." Raven accused him angrily.

_Calm Raven! Don't let this guy get to you. Don't show him your change. Focus! _She tried to sooth herself but it didn't really work. She was still angry.

"I couldn't hear you really. You spoke too quietly," he told her and then turned his head towards Kori and flashed her, a dazzling smile.

"I didn't really introduce myself to you yesterday. So, hey, I am Richard and Miss I-can't-smile's new neighbor," he said and took Kori's hand and kissed the back of her hand. Kori giggled lightly.

"Hey, I am Kori! Miss I-can't smile's friend!" she introduced herself smiling brightly, she like this guy. He seemed really nice.

"That's not funny," Raven hissed and couldn't stop herself from glaring at Richard. But Richard ignored her completely.

"So, I heard you like someone. Who is it?" he asked openly.

Kori didn't know why, but something at Richard made her trust him. It was as if she would know him her whole life. His smiled disarmed her; he seemed nice and so trustworthy.

So, she once again pointed at the red-haired man who was still leaning at a tree and listening to his music.

Richard smiled and nodded. "Ok, wait a minute." He said and stood up from the bench to jog towards the red-haired man.

"Richard, wait! Don't do this!" Kori yelled after him.

"That's what you get when you talk and trust this jerk!" Raven hissed and together they watched Richard's moves.

They saw how he approached the young man and how they talk with each other. Richard pointed in Raven's and Kori's direction and then the two men began to walk to the bench.

"He's coming, he's coming!" Kori whispered clutching Raven's arm.

"I can see that," Raven said and wriggled her arm out of Kori's death grip. She was becoming incredibly annoyed as the day went on, and it was really hard for to hide this fact.

"He is here," Kori once again whispered and then looked up at the two men who were now standing in front of them.

"So ladies, I want you to meet a good friend of mine," Richard said pointing at the red head next to him. "This is Roy Harper." He introduced. "And these are my new friends: Raven," he pointed at Raven who had a slightly pissed expression. "You don't have to be afraid. She might look sour. She may look pissed, but you know barking dogs do not bite." This intensified the death glare. "And next to Miss Sour is her lovely friend Kori." Richard said, winking at Kori, who just kept smiling at Roy.

"It's really nice to meet you guys," Roy said and stared at Kori for a while. "Really nice," he cleared his throat. "Unfortunately, I have to go to my lesson," he said his eyes never leaving Kori's. "But tonight I'll work as DJ at the club Foxy and I would be more than happy to see you there." He said, never taking his eyes off of Kori, they smiled at each other.

"Don't worry," Richard assured him. "We'll come."

Roy smiled one last time at Kori and then walked away from them.

Richard grinned wildly and took his seat between the two girls. "So, how was I?" he asked and wiggled his eyebrows.

"Fantastic!" Kori smiled and hugged him. "I owe you something. He invited me to his club. That's so-"

"That's so stupid!" Raven deadpanned and rolled her eyes.

Kori shot her an insulted glare.

"Don't listen to her," Richard said. "She's just jealous that you have a boyfriend now and she doesn't." he smirked and looked at Raven to see her reaction.

Raven's eyes winded in fury and before she knew what she was saying, the words flew out of her mouth. "I have a boyfriend!"

Kori looked at her surprised and puzzled and Richard's smirk just grew wider.

"You do?" he asked bemused.

"Yes, I do," she confirmed and shot Kori a glance which told her to shut up and not to say a thing.

"So, do you mind telling me his name?" Richard asked.

For moment Raven thought she would die. A name? He wanted to hear a name. Her mind wheeled and wheeled. But the only male name her mind could come up with was …

"Garfield. His name is Garfield… Garfield Logan." Raven answered cussing herself for her stupidity. She saw that Kori's eyes winded and she gasped silently.

"Oh," Richard said and for an instant Raven could swear that she could see something more than playfulness in his face … disappointment? No, she had to be seeing things.

"Ok, but I guess you and your boyfriend won't come to the club tonight, will you?" he questioned, clearing issuing a dare. He dared her to come. In her mind, it was clear that she couldn't say no. To not show up would admit defeat. She was not going to lose to him.

So, she said confidently, more confidently than she really felt.

"I will come and so will Garfield!"

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_**A/N: ** So, what do you think? Bad? Good? Medicore? Review and tell me!_

_Btw, thanks and much to everyone who had reviewed last time and for all the other chapters. It's great to know that you still read this story and actually like it! So, thank you very, very, very much!_

_And reviewer responses will come next chapter! _

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_Oh, before I forget: **YamiTai: **Your definitely didn´t sound foolish... I´m actually glad you asked. Btw, I read in your profile that you are from Germany and since I´m from Germany aswell: Hey! Ich finde es echt cool, dass jemand aus Deutschland meine Geschichte liest! Also, vielen dank für deine review and ich hoffe dass meine story dir immer noch gefällt!_

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_I think, that's it from me…_

_Until next chapter…_

_Alena_


	4. Walk me home

_**A/N: **Yeah, a fast update… basically because I don't want to be the cause of a suicide… so, Bria, here is your update…_

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_Thanks to my super-talented and wonderful beta and friend **Cherry Jade**… (Go and read her new one-shot "Wish". It's awesome… so you will love it!)_

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_Dedicated to **Bria**, _**Raven of the Night676**, _**Cherry Jade**, **YamiTai **and **Lain the Fluff-Master**_

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_**Disclaimer: I don't own the Teen Titans… truth to be told, I don't own anything…**_

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**_4. Walk Me home_**

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"No Raven, I can't come with you." Garfield Logan said as he walked with Raven down the street.

"Why not?" Raven asked frustrated. She hadn't thought it would be that difficult to convince Garfield.

"I have a date with Terra."

"You always have a date with someone. For once you could do something with me." Ok, Raven knew that what she was doing him wrong. He usually asked her to go out with him and have fun but that was not the point. She wanted him to feel guilty. No matter what it had to take she needed to convince him.

"But Rae, she says I am handsome and that she loves me." Garfield wailed.

"Of course, she tells you that she loves you. She just wants to get away from her annoying parents she lives with. And you are the perfect moron." Raven shook her head at his credulously thinking.

"That was really mean and bitchy. She-"

"The only reason why I am so bitchy is that jerk Richard is a pain in my neck." Raven fumed without really listening to Garfield.

"Why are you so upset? I mean, you've only known him since yesterday." Garfield asked her as they turned left into a street.

"Do you want to know what he said about me? He asserted that I wouldn't know how to smile and that I couldn't have fun. I-"

"Hey, hey," Garfield grabbed her shoulders and looked at her seriously. "Raven, he's totally right."

Raven rolled her eyes and shoved his hands away. "I know that he's right but I didn't want hear that from him." She sighed.

Ok, so far nothing had worked. Garfield didn't leave her any other options. She had to do it.

"I just want to show him that I, as well can have a boyfriend. A handsome, intelligent and sexy boyfriend." She said.

Puzzled, Garfield stopped in his track while Raven continued walking.

'_Did she really say sexy?'_ he asked himself and jogged to her.

"What did you say?" he asked her. "Do you really think that I am sexy?" he added to make sure that she really understand.

'_Here we go, Raven. Tell him what he wants to hear.' _"Of course, you are," she replied. "But you know, you are right. I shouldn't try to do something stupid. We-"

"No, no." Garfield cut her short. "We will do it."

"We will do what?" she asked innocently.

"Tonight, I will be your boyfriend and you my girlfriend." He said her with a big grin.

"And what about Terra?"

"Who's Terra?" he replied nonchalantly.

Raven mentally rolled her eyes. It was so easy to manipulate men. Just tell them they are sexy and handsome and they would do everything for you.

But there was nonetheless the feeling of guilt: She knew it wasn't right to lie and use Gar in such a way. But she shoved this feeling aside.

"Ok, we will meet at the "Foxy". Nine o'clock and don't be late!" she admonished him.

* * *

Raven looked around her. The club was full of bright-colored, dancing and laughing people. From everywhere she was greeted by smiling and happy faces. Everything she loathed was here in this club. She was so stupid to agree to this. No, she was stuck in a club with dumb people, and on top of all she had to act as if she Garfield were together. That meant she couldn't hit him when he touched her like he was doing at the moment: Garfield was holding her hand leading her towards the bar. Then he let go of her hand and place it on the small of her back as if nudging her forward through the crowd. Ok, this touch seemed nothing big, but for Raven it **_was_** an intimate touch, a sign of pure possessiveness. She couldn't change but feel uncomfortable. She never allowed anybody to come this close to her. It just didn't feel right.

The little group came to a halt at the bar and at the same time Roy Harper approached them. Kori immediately wore a big love-drunk smile on her face which perfectly matched Roy's expression.

"Are you enjoying yourselves?" Roy asked but his eyes were glued on Kori who was wearing a black, ribbed, sweater halter-top that bared her shoulders and mid-drift; a lavender, short, silk skirt that flared slightly at her hips; matching jet-black stockings and a pair of multi strapped, black heels topped off her outfit. Roy couldn't keep his eyes from her.

"Of course, we are." Richard answered.

"I have to go up to play the music. Do you want to come?" Roy asked Kori.

"Yeah," she nodded while Roy turned around to walk at the stage.

Kori smiled at Richard and hugged him tightly. "I love you," she said and ran after Roy. "Don't tell that to me, say it to Roy!" he called after her but Kori had already disappeared.

"So, this is your boyfriend?" Richard asked Raven as the remaining trio sat down on stools at the bar.

"Yes," both nodded.

Richard smiled and looked from Raven to Garfield. "Tell me, where did you meet each other?"

For a moment Raven and Garfield glanced at each other. "In the park," Garfield answered.

"In the park?" Richard repeated curiously. "Yeah, in the park," Raven confirmed.

"What did you do in the park?" he asked.

"I was taking my dog for a walk and so was she," Garfield told him proud of his quick thinking.

"That's really strange, because Raven doesn't have a dog." Richard mused.

"Oh, uhm … she was taking my dog for a walk." Garfield hesitantly replied.

"But how can she take your dog when **you** were taking your dog for a walk?"

"I have two dogs! To be honest, I have many dogs," Garfield lamely answered. He could feel the fiercely glare Raven was sending him. He was so gonna be dead. "And sometimes, I feel like a dog myself," he muttered.

Raven placed his hands on Garfield's shoulder to silence him. "However, we then meet each other at a friend of ours."

"Which friend?" Richard asked.

Raven opened his mouth to answer but Garfield said. "Terra!"

"Terra?" Raven asked surprised. Garfield leaned closer to her and whispered. "Terra with her annoying parents, is here!" and gestured with his eyes at the entrance of the club. Raven looked at the entrance and saw a blond, slender woman wearing a black miniskirt and a tight yellow sweater. The blonde waved at Garfield and began to walk towards him while Garfield turned white as a sheet.

"What are you doing here?" Terra asked her hands on her hips. "I thought you had some issues with your parents?"

"Oh yeah," Garfield stammered. "This is my mother," he gestured at Raven. "and this is my father." He pointed at Richard with a sheepish expression.

Richard grinned evilly and turned his face to Terra. "He is such a joker. Nice to meet you, Terra?" he said and kissed her hand lightly. "These two told me how they had met each other through you."

Terra looked confused at Richard and then at Garfield. "What?"

"Aren't you the Terra with the annoying parents?" Richard questioned irritated and looked at Garfield.

Terra glared enraged at Garfield. "You already have a girlfriend?"

"No, she isn't my-" he began but was cut short by Terra.

"No, it's ok." She fumed and stormed away.

"Terra, wait …" Garfield yelled helplessly after her.

Richard stared in fake-disbelief at Raven and Gar. "So, you aren't really together?"

Raven growled. "Don't act so innocent. You knew it all along. Everything you did was just an act to embarrass me. You're so childish."

"Beg your pardon? The only one childish is you. You were the one playing an act." He told her.

"Yeah, you were the one," Garfield chimed in. Raven shot murderous glare at Gar and turned back at Richard.

"Yes, but just because you said I couldn't have fun," she gestured around the club. "Look, at these people and how they get drunk. Is this fun? Fine, but I don't want to live like that." She screamed.

"You don't want to live like that because you can't. You're boring and no fun." Richard smirked.

Garfield nodded in agreement. "Yes, you are no fun."

Richard turned away from Raven and so did Garfield. They both hovered now over the counter. "This Terra chick is really nice." Richard said to Raven. "How 'well' do you know her?" he asked slyly. "Not well enough. But I hope to change that soon." Gar replied winking and smirking.

Raven who stood behind them pushed them both away and took one of the vodka-glasses on the counter and drunk it at one swallow before grabbing the next one.

Garfield reached out to stop her but Richard held him back. "Let her," he said and watched drinking her third glass.

"But-" Garfield began to protest but was cut short by Raven. "It's time for disco," she hiccupped and ran to the dance floor.

Richard and Garfield looked after her eyes wide and mouths open. "Oh, oh!" they said in unison before following her to prevent anything embarrassing.

* * *

**_Two hours later_**

"Let me go," Raven yelled and pounded her fists at Richard's shoulder. He had thrown her over his shoulder to carry her out of the club followed by Garfield. Once they were out of the full and noisy club he let her down.

"Why did you carry me out?" Raven asked him, her voice slurred because of the alcohol. She was clearly drunk. "First you tell me to have fun and they you don't let me," she wailed as she tried to steady herself which was really difficult because the whole world seemed to spin around her. "You didn't let me have fun, that's-"

"Would you please shut up?" Richard interrupted her and grabbed her shoulders to make sure that she didn't fell down.

"Why are you yelling at me?" she asked him timidly. She turned her head to Garfield who had watched them clearly amused. "Why is he yelling at me?" she asked him. Garfield smiled and shrugged. Raven drunk was really a sight. He grabbed her hand and pulled her carefully to him. "I think I'll bring her home. She had enough fun for today."

Richard shook his head and grabbed Raven's other hand. "I think, it is better if I bring her home," Garfield eyed him suspiciously. "I mean, we are living on the same street. We have the same way home. It's just logical that I bring her home." Richard explained and pulled Raven closer to him. Garfield reluctantly let go of her.

It felt strange to let her go with Richard. He liked Richard – he seemed to be a nice guy. But still – it didn't felt right. It was always him who brought her home. He was her friend.

"Ok. I think … we'll see each other tomorrow?" Garfield said and looked at Raven profusely ignoring Richard. It came out more as question than a statement.

Raven waved awkwardly. "Yes, tomorrow," she said still feeling dizzy and wobbly.

Richard nodded at Garfield and with Raven's hand intertwined in his they slowly began to walk away.

Garfield watched them until they had disappeared behind a corner. Somehow he had a strange, ugly feeling in his stomach.

Why did seeing Raven walking away with Richard bother him so much?

"We're walking home?" Raven asked hiccupping as she and Robin walked down the street.

Richard smiled. "Of course. What did you think we would do?"

"You don't have a car?" she inquired.

"No."

"So, you always walk?"

"No."

Raven glared at him annoyed. She was drunk and he still managed to piss her off.

He laughed. "I have a motorbike." He added.

"Then why aren't we riding back with your motorbike?"

He laughed again this time louder. "We would, if you weren't so drunk. You aren't able to walk by yourself let alone steady yourself on the bike."

"I am not drunk," Raven protested and let go of his hand. "See, I am able to walk by myself!" And to demonstrate it, she began to walk some steps before tripping over her own feet. She would have fell down if Richard hadn't thrown her arms around her waist from behind to steady her.

He smirked. "Oh yeah, I see how well you can walk without me." He took her hand again. "Do you know that this is the second time I caught you?" he reminded her.

Raven chose to not say anything. She was feeling worse to protest. A feeling of nausea was washing over her and head was still spinning. And to be honest, she was glad that Richard was helping her.

For a while they walked next to each other in silence. But it wasn't uncomfortable. It didn't feel awkward – it was strangely nice.

"Do you know, that the way I am leading you reminds of the way a parent would do while walking a child to school?" Richard suddenly said. He grinned, waiting for a nasty or sarcastic comment from her. He couldn't help himself but to provoke her. It was just too much fun. She always seemed to have an answer for everything. He glanced at her from the corner of his eyes but to his utter surprise there was no annoyance there. There was just sadness. Her indigo eyes seemed inky in this moment just as if a shadow had spread his wings over them.

"When I was little, my father used to walk me to school. He had taken my hand in his and together we walked to school," she spoke softly but she seemed to be far away – immersed in memories. Distantly, Raven could hear her mind screaming at her to shut up. She had already given away too much of herself. The wall she hid herself behind had begun to crack. It was crumbling – something she couldn't allow.

She had expected everything. She had expected him to make fun of her or to ask stupid questions about her father but not this.

"My parents died when I was eight. I was adopted by a nice and kind man I consider as my father. But, you know, my father walked me to school. I always told him that I wouldn't like holding his hand. It was not cool for a boy holding his father's hands at that age," he paused and Raven couldn't stop himself from looking at him intensively. He was handsome – really handsome. But the most striking were his eyes. His azure eyes seemed to drown you into them to never release you again. A deep, bottomless sea. "But to be honest, I loved it. I loved holding his hand. It made me feel protected and needed at the same time. I miss holding his hand." He turned his face to hers and his open eyes met her wide, amethyst orbs.

"Now, I am holding your hand, I feel protected and needed. So, me holding your hand is more for me than for you." He smiled. "Thank you," he whispered and stopped walking.

Raven was speechless. He had basically opened up his heart for her. He had told her things about his life and himself she would have never done. Wasn't he afraid to be hurt?

He had told her that she made him feel protected and needed. She, the cold, emotionless, sarcastic woman, made him feel protected and needed.

"I-" she began without really knowing what to say.

"We're here." He interrupted her and gestured at her house they were now standing in front.

She nodded but didn't turn away from him. Somehow she felt that she had to say something – anything that showed that she treasured his openness. It was stupid – she knew it. She had never felt obligated to do nice things for other people. But until today nobody had told her what **_he_** had.

But she didn't know what she should say. She was never a person of many words. Maybe there was nothing she could say but there was something she could give him.

She took a deep breath.

"Thanks," she said quietly almost inaudible. "Thanks, for walking me home." She added and her face came closer to his and then she …

… smiled.

Her lips fell into a smile. It was not a big, beaming smile. It was a small, soft and sweet smile. A smile which reached her eyes brightening them slightly.

Richard stared at her dumbfounded, but then a big grin spread over his face.

"You're welcome." He said and watched her disappearing behind her door.

In this night, Richard only dreamt about a certain purple haired beauty with her sweet and intriguing smile.

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_**A/N: **Another chapter and another opportunity for you to tell me how you like the chapter… so, review… if you want to… yeah…_

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_Reviewer responses:_

**_666RaVeN999: Thank you very much… glad you think so… _**

**_Cherry Jade: Thanks… it's always wonderful to read your reviews and mails… they always make so happy._**

_**I'm glad you like the chapter… oh yes, our dear Boy Wonder is a bit jealous, but I think he feels better in this chapter. I'm happy that you like the way I portray Star… she is so difficult to write…**_

_**Anyway, thank you very much for your review and all the support. You rock girl…**_

**_  
Teen Titans Obsessor: Glad to hear from you again… oh yes, I busy these last weeks, but I'm glad you like my fics and thanks for your review._**

**_azn sister 92: Thanks, glad you like the last chapter and I think how Gar feels about Raven is a bit clearer in this chapter._**

_**Thanks again for your review and I hope you liked this chapter! **_

**_  
jghgfkgkjjhykgh: Uh… thanks…?_**

**_Dusky92: Thank you… hope you liked this chapter!_**

**_Lain the Fluff-Master: Lain! It's really good to hear from you… I love to read your reviews…_**

_**Desperation can do many things to you… believe me I know about what I'm talking!**_

_**Oh, this time Richard isn't really jealous… but maybe we will be in later chapters… who knows?**_

_**Thanks for the review and I'm glad you like this chapter and hopefully you liked this chapter as well. **_

**_And FOREVER: Thanks fort he review and glad you like the chapter. Hopefully you continue enjoying my story._**

**_Raven of the Night676: Here is your update… hopefully it was soon enough…_**

_**Glad you still remember the story and you were totally with the next chapter. So, I hope this chapter made you laugh and you liked it.**_

_**Thank you so much for the review… that means a lot to me…**_

**_Indigowolf: And once again… thank you very much!_**

**_ghostfang: Thanks! Glad you liked it and hope you liked this chapter as well._**

**_lunafan: Don't worry a bit of the Teen Titans series will be integrated into this story… just wait and you will see._**

_**Thanks for your review and hopefully you will continue enjoying this story…**_

**_Phantom Dragon of Eternal Chaos; Thanks and I will try my best… hope you liked this chapter!_**

**_Aero: Thanks and glad you liked it…_**

**_ELM-Tree10: Yeah, I'm currently reposting this story… that's why you remember this story._**

_**I'm sorry to say that I left the chapter as it was, because I liked the way it was… so, sorry, but your idea was great…**_

**_Tecna: You know, I love the song 'It's time for disco´… basically I love the whole soundtrack to the movie… it's great!_**

_**Anyway, I'm really glad that you liked the last chapter and I hope you like this chapter as well…**_

_**I think, I got the hint… it was difficult to understand, but I got it…**_

**_YamiTai: Hey!_**

_**Danke für die ganzen Kompliment, aber ich bin nicht wirklich gut… I versuch einfach mein bestes… und Englisch war immer mein bestes Fach (hatte es auch als LK-Fach)**_

_**Ja, die Charaktere sind wirklich OOC, aber leider ist das immer so in meinen stories…**_

**_Du hast so was von recht, Kal Ho Naa Hofand ich von den ganzen Bollywood-filmen, die hier liefen auch am besten. Mal gucken, wie der Film am Freitag ist…_**

**_Aurora812: Thank you soooo much… so glad that you liked it and hopefully you liked this chapter as well._**

**_Iris Night: Yeah, Rae and Rob together are just great… you have to love them._**

_**So, thanks for the review and all the compliments… hopefully you will continue to enjoy this story.**_

**_Monchhichi: Here is your update and thanks for the review…_**

**_Chica De Los Ojos Café: Thank youuuuu... I'm happy you enjoyed the last chapter and hopefully you enjoyed this chapter as well…_**

**_Bria: Ok, I hope you liked this chapter, because I really hurried up to update this story… I don't want to be the cause for your death… so, I hope you enjoyed this chapter…_**

**_Notexactlyagoddess: I hope you liked this chapter better, but then again Raven is really OOC in this chapter… so, tell me what you think…_**

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_**Ok, that was it from me…**_

_**Until next chapter…**_

_**Alena**_


	5. Can’t help falling in love

_**A/N: **Yeah, it's another chapter… aren't you all happy…? I am happy… really happy…_

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_Thanks and kudos to my awesome beta and friend **Cherry Jade**…_

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_Ok, before you can read the next chapter, I just wanted to apologize for the delays between the chapters of my stories. It's just that I'm not really feeling well. I had the flu and I'm still a bit ill… I can't get rid of the fever and I haven't really slept for days and everything is soooo chaotic and hectic right now… ok, basically I'm just not feeling very well and I hope you will forgive if I don't update as fast as you're used from me. I'll try my best and try to write as much as possible…_

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_Dedicated to everyone who had reviewed, but especially to **Cherry Jade, Tecna, **_**Raven of the Night676 **and **_Mol_**

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_No, enjoy the chapter…_

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_**Disclaimer: I don't own the Teen Titans**_

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**_Chapter Five:_**

**_Can't Help Falling In Love_**

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It was 13:30 o'clock as Raven awoke from a deep slumber. She couldn't believe that she actually had slept that long. Usually, she was the first one to wake up Sundays mornings.

The first thought she had was to quickly sallow as much pills she could get to stop her headache.

Raven groggily got out of her bed and walked straight the bathroom. Maybe a cold shower would help.

15 minutes later she realized that probably nothing could help to get rid of her aching head.

Raven walked down to the kitchen where her mother stood in front of the stove humming happily.

"Good morning, darling," she greeted her daughter without turning around from the stove.

Raven mumbled something like "Morning" before plumbing into a chair.

"So, was it nice yesterday?" Raven only grunted.

"My head is killing me. I think I'll go back to my room." Raven said.

"Oh darling," Arella said sympathetically and put her hand on Raven's forehead. "But before you go back to your room, could you please bring this cake," she gestured at a cheesecake on the counter, "to Richard?"

With mentioning of their neighbor's name Raven was suddenly fully awake. "Richard." she repeated, mindlessly.

"Yes, since he was so kind to offer to train Josh, it would be appreciated to give him a thank you." Arella told her.

"Why doesn't Josh bring the cake to him?" Raven asked. She didn't want to see Richard. She was just so unsure how she should behave towards him. He had seen a side of her nobody was allowed to see for a long time. He had seen without her security mask.

"Josh isn't here at the moment." Her mother said.

"How about you or Mi-" she dropped the sentence as she saw the dangerous glare her mother shot at her.

Raven sighed defeated. "Ok, I'll go," Raven reluctantly gave in and took a long sip from her tea.

Her mother still stared at her.

"What?" Raven asked and sighed lonely. "Ok, I will go now." With that she stood up.

"Sweetheart, that's so nice of you!" Arella smiled brightly and handed her daughter the cake and shoved her out of the kitchen. "Oh, and please try to be nice. I don't want him to think we're impolite," she called after her daughter as Raven walked to Richard's house.

With a cheesecake in her hand she stood several minutes in front of the door.

She would quickly give him the cake and then go back to her house. Nothing to be worried about or? Slowly her right hand reached for the bell.

_**Ding Dong**_

She waited and prayed that maybe he wasn't there and then she hoped that he was there.

Just as she wanted to turn around to go, the door was opened and a tall, muscular Afro-American man was greeting her. Raven realized that it was the same man she had met the day she had come to know Richard.

The man looked at her with warm, brown eyes and somehow she immediately liked him.

"Uh..." She began to speak but the man had already dragged her inside. "You are probably here for Richard, aren't you?" he asked.

"Yes, I just-"

"He's in his training room." He told her and mentioned her to follow him upstairs.

Ok, that that was it. She couldn't get rid of the cake as fast as she wanted. Raven reluctantly followed him.

"By the way, I think we didn't really get introduced," he said while walking up the stairs. "I'm Victor Stone, but Vic is perfectly fine." He smiled warmly at her.

"Raven. Raven Roth and I hate any short form of my name. So, no Rae or Ravy or Rave. Just Raven." She told him.

Victor chuckled. "I'll remember that."

He abruptly stopped in front of a dark-green door and opened it only to reveal a large, wide room. In the middle of the room was Richard in grey sweatpants and bare chest punching and kicking at a punching bag furiously. Several drops of sweat were glistering on his chiseled and tanned chest.

"Hey Dick," Victor called out and Richard stopped his kicking. "You've got a visitor."

Richard looked at the door and smiled as soon as he saw Raven.

He bended down to pick up the towel which was lying on the floor, and then slowly moved towards Victor and Raven.

"Hey," he greeted her.

"H-Hello," she stammered and cringed mentally for her lack of control. Why was acting so … so … girly?

"You made this for me?" Richard asked teasingly and gestured with his chin at Raven's hands.

Raven looked at Richard him not really understanding what he meant before remembering why she was here. "Oh, yeah … I mean, my mother baked this sent it to you as a thank you for training with Josh," Raven explained. "Your mother?" he asked grinning. "And you are sure, you didn't bake it?" Raven frowned and shot him a glare everybody would run away screaming their lungs out.

But Richard was not everybody.

Victor, who had watched both of them, chuckled a bit. "I think, I should bring the cake downstairs before one of you decide to use it as a weapon. "That's not a bad idea," Raven mumbled as she handed the cake to Victor, who smiled at her words and then left the room to go to the kitchen.

Once she was alone with Richard, Raven once again felt really uncomfortable. It was ironic that this man could make her feel so many emotions. No matter what he did, he was always able to stir up her feelings.

"A penny for your thoughts," Richard interrupted her musing. She slightly flinched but covered that up quickly. "My thoughts aren't that cheap," she retorted and saw the smirk on his face. "Raven, if you wanted to see me, you just had to come. You don't need any excuses - like a cake." "For the last time: My mother sent the cake and I didn't want to see you! You are so … so … so … impossible." Raven growled and turned to storm out of the room.

But before she could leave she heard him saying. "It wasn't that bad was it?" his voice was soft and gentle. She turned her face to his. "What?" she asked questioning. "Yesterday, it wasn't that bad?" he cleared and his eyes were locked with hers. But without waiting for an answer from him he continued. "I know, you don't want to admit it but I know that you had fun."

"I didn't-"

Richard shook his head. "But then again you hide yourself behind your mask."

"I-"

"I mean, I saw you smile. You can smile but you hide your pretty smile behind your emotionless mask. Why?"

"I don't smile for nothing. I need a good reason to smile." Raven said clearly surprised by the change of their conversation.

"So, that means, I am a good reason for you to smile?" he asked and the mischievous glint was back in his azure orbs.

Raven rolled her eyes and let out a "pff".

"You are so full of yourself. Do you know that?"

"Actually, no. So, I am impossible and full of myself. What else?"

"A jerk!"

"Yes?"

"You are an impossible, arrogant, annoying jerk!"

"It's good to know that there is someone who actually doesn't like me. After awhile it's getting really boring if everybody loves you." He slyly grinned and walked closer to her. They were now just inches away from each other.

Raven was seething. "Who do you think you are-" she began but was silenced by Richard placing his finger on her lips. "Ssshhh!" he said and the mischievous glint had disappeared from his eyes only to be replaced by a dark shadow.

"Just one thing: No matter where your father is, he is probably watching over you."

Raven's eyes winded in surprise. He couldn't know this. She hadn't told him. "Where … I mean, how-"

Richard smiled sadly. "It doesn't matter how I know. The only thing that matters is, that you father can see all of your emotions. He can see your anger, your sadness - your everything. And believe every time you cry he is crying with you. And although you can't brush away his tears you can at least stop his tears." His fingers softly wandered from her lips to her soft, red tinted cheeks. "If not for yourself then you should at least try to smile for him."

For the hundredth time, Richard had rendered her speechless. His words once again managed to break through her wall she had built around her. But not only his words but also his actions surprised her. She could still feel his hand on her cheek softly creasing her flushed cheek. Normally she would kill anybody who dared to touch her. But somehow she couldn't bring herself to withdraw from his touch. It was strangely soothing and calming – just like his hands would belong there.

Later, she would say that what had happened next was – probably – the biggest mistake in her life. Richard's head began to move closer to hers, closing the distance between them. Raven watched in horror as Richard's lips moved closer and closer to hers. _'Run! Don't let this happen. It's wrong.' _However, it didn't feel like it was wrong. In fact, it felt ... right and perfect.

To let him kiss her? In this atmosphere? It felt almost too surreal ... Not wanting to think of the consequences of what was about to happen, Raven closed her eyes and lifted her head up slightly, waiting for what would change both of their lives forever.

But just as she felt his lips millimeters away from hers, the door of the training sprung open.

"Hey," the deep, baritone voice of Victor could be heard through the room. Raven quickly jerked away from Richard and took some steps away from him towards the door.

Victor looked from Richard to Raven and then back to Richard. "I just wanted to see what you were doing. Did I disturb anything?"

"No!" Raven answered hastily – too hastily. "I think I should go now. Don't worry I'll let myself out." With that said Raven turned her back to Richard walking through the door.

"Bye, Raven. I'll see tomorrow!"

"Bye!" she said to both men without turning around.

Richard and Victor kept silent until they heard the front door shut.

Victor looked at his friend worriedly. "Dick, you-"

"Don't say it." Richard shook his head and tried to leave the room.

"Robin!"

With the mentioning of the name "Robin", he turned again to his friend a furious glint in his eyes. Fist clenched tightly, he spat angrily. "Don't you ever call me that again! I am not Robin. Robin is dead. Do you understand?"

Victor just looked at his seething friend without really caring about his wrath.

"Robin, Richard, Dick … it doesn't matter how I call you. You're the same person. No matter how hard you try: You can't run away." Victor sighed as he saw the expression of his friend harden. "But that's not the point. The point is: You'll hurt her if you don't stop."

"I-" Richard tried to ague but was silenced by Victor.

"No, Richard. I can see it. You're falling for her and although I know that you just want to help her, you'll hurt her more if you continue this. Just for once listen to me. And leave her alone. She's a nice girl. Just don't do this to her. And to yourself." Victor glanced one last time at his friend and then left the room leaving behind a confused Richard.

Richard watched his friend leave. He once again sadly shook his head.

"I am not falling for her." He whispered into the silent room.

"I've **already **fallen for her."

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_**A/N: **That was it… the chapter… tell me, how you liked it… that means, that you have to review… but only if you want to…_

_I wanted to thank everyone who had reviewed for the last chapter… and wanted to say how sorry I am that I haven't answered your reviews, but I will answer them this time… so, I'm just so sorry…_

_Ok…_

_Until next time…_

_Alena_


	6. Love me

_**A/N: **Yes, it's the next chapter… a yay for me… not much to say… read the end for more A/N´s…_

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_Thanks to my lovely and wonderful beta and friend **Cherry Jade!**_

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_**Disclaimer: Not mine…**_

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**_Chapter Six:_**

**_Love Me …_**

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The last week went by in a blur for everybody – but Raven. The last week was – at least in her opinion – was like hell. The last five days she had done nothing else than play seek and hide with Richard and she had been the winner of the game. She was able to avoid him the last days. No matter if it was in college or in their neighbourhood, Raven had successfully managed to avoid any meeting. She should be happy that she hadn't seen this jerk for such a long time but somehow she … wasn't.

She wasn't happy that she hadn't seen Richard for seven days, she wasn't glad that they hadn't had an argument for seven days but what amazed her, surprised her, rendered her speechless was … that she was disappointed to not being able to kiss him. She had wanted to kiss him and if Victor hadn't disturbed them, she would have let happen it. Raven would have let him kiss her. She would have let him crumble the walls around her without really minding.

And that was the problem.

She didn't mind Richard breaking through her protective walls. She didn't mind him being so close to her. She didn't mind realizing that she had some feelings towards this man. Feelings, she couldn't really understand or maybe didn't want to understand of fear of the overwhelming result.

She-

"Hello? Earth to Raven?" A hand appeared in her sight waving madly in front of her face. Raven's eyes followed the arm and saw Garfield looking worriedly at her. "Are you ok?"

Raven shook her head to clear her head. She looked around only to realize that she was in Garfield's living room. "Y-Yeah, I'm fine." She stammered cursing her lack of control.

Looking deeply in her friend's eyes, she could still see worry in them.

"Are you sure, Rae?" he inquired, profusely using the nickname she hated so much but only he was allowed to use.

"Yes. I was just … thinking about … something." _'Or someone,' _her mind added.

Garfield's expression hardened for a moment only to be replaced by a soft, sad smile. "You're thinking about him, don't you?"

"What?"

"You were thinking about Richard, weren't you?" he asked.

"I wasn't thinking about him. Why should I?" she said almost in defence.

Garfield opened his mouth to say something but then he decided against it if Raven wanted to play this game, so may it be. "If you say so." He only said turning his attention back to the books which were spread at the table.

'_He knows I'm lying!' _Raven heard her mind whispering and she couldn't change it.

Her eyes drifted to the old clock which was hanging on the wall. "Uh, I should go now. Mum is probably already waiting," she said picking up her books and stuffing them in her bag.

Garfield smiled and stretched smugly. "That's the advantage when you have your own apartment. You can do what you want, when you want. You don't have to be worried that someone might be waiting for you or anything else." His smile grew only wider. "You know, you can always move in with me. I have plenty of room."

Raven raised a sceptical eyebrow and looked around the room. Her eyes landed on the open pizza-boxes and pieces of clothes which were lying on the floor.

"Thanks," she shook her head in disgust. "But no."

"Just for you to know: This offer is without any date. So, if you ever feel like talking or needing some time alone, you can always come here – to me." Garfield spoke gently and smiled.

Raven blinked. It was not everyday she was able to witness Garfield not being his usual playful-self.

"O-Ok. I'll remember that." She answered and with a small smile, she added. "Thanks."

"Anything for you." he whispered as Raven left.

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She was late. It was nine o'clock and she was late. Raven shook her head in frustration. Her mother would kill her. Arella Roth hated it if any of her children miss dinner. Somehow, she insisted on dinner with the whole "family". Of course, if you can call them a family.

Raven turned the key inside the lock and the door sprang open only to reveal darkness.

"Mum?" Raven called as she entered the house. There was no response.

She walked to the living room and kitchen but her mother was nowhere to be found.

Slowly but surely a feeling of fear clouded Raven's mind. This wasn't like her mother. Her mother would never leave the house at such an hour.

'_Think Raven, where could she be!'_

She could be asleep? With this thought the raven-haired woman walked upstairs. Once again, she was greeted by darkness and silence. The first room on the hall was her mother's. Raven cracked the door open but nobody was there. This couldn't be. Her mother has to be there. She walked to the door next to her mother's and opened this as well. Raven sighed and let out the breath she had been holding. Mira was lying in her bed. One arm under her huge pillow while her other small hand was clutching on her blanket.

She silently closed the door. Ok, if Mira was here than her mother had to be here. Arella would never leave Mira alone. Never. And since Josh was staying over night at a friend, she didn't have to worry, did she?

But where could her mother be? Raven hated to admit it but she was frightened. She didn't know what to do. And she loathed the thought of being helpless and weak. She wasn't weak. She didn't do fear.

Maybe she should check her own room?

Raven almost tiptoed to the end of the hall where her room was.

'_Please, let her be in there!' _the dark woman prayed as she opened the door to her room.

At the sight which greeted her in her room, she was tempted to let out a shriek but shrieking was also something she didn't do. So, she caught herself before doing anything embarrassing.

Instead, she narrowed her eyes and her voice dropped deadly. "What. Are. You. Doing. Here?"

Raven couldn't believe her eyes. There – on her bed – was Richard. He was leaning against the headboard with a photo album in his lap. He was in her room. Without her permission. No one was allowed to go to her room. Especially not a man who seemed to arouse so many feelings within her.

Richard gave her one of his heart melting smiles. "You know, you were a really cute child. And I never could have pictured you in a pink dress?" he laughed totally ignoring her question.

For a fraction of a moment, Raven looked at the onyx-haired man in front of her in utterly confusion before her mind clicked. Immediately she launched forward to grab the album lying in his lap but as if he had expected something like that, Richard pulled away the album, causing Raven to grab at nothing and making her crash into his hard, muscular chest.

Blushing deeply, she quickly got up and growled at him angrily. "Give me the album."

"Tsk, tsk, tsk, Raven. Is this the way you welcome guests?" He teased with a smug grin.

Raven straightened herself and positioned herself in front of the bed. "What are you doing here anyway?" she asked again. "I'm babysitting," he replied as if she was the stupidest person to ask such a question. "I thought your mother could need some time for herself, so I suggested that she could go out. And I volunteered to look after Mira since you were late. By the way, you really have a nice and extremely cute little sister. It's a wonder with a sister like you."

She ignored his comment and questioned him further. "But what are you doing in **_MY _**room?" her voice was dripping with venom.

"Oh," he waved his hand through the air. "I was bored and I thought this would be the perfect chance to get to know you better. I mean, since you tried everything to avoid me, this was the only way," he said nonchalantly, his smile never wavering from his lips.

Somehow, this left her speechless. He wanted to know her better. Nobody wanted to know her better. Most people would give up the second she push them way the first time. Only few tried to come close to her a second time. And Richard was the only one trying and insisting to know her after countless arguments, countless quarrels and countless insults. She was touched and she knew that she wanted him to know her better. She wanted to let him see her the way she truly was.

Raven sighed, pushing away Richard's legs she sit on her bed. Looking deeply into each others eyes, they just sat there for what seemed like an eternity but only were some minutes.

Finally, Richard opened the photo-album and pointed at one photo in particular. "That's the one I love the most," he said. "You look so innocent, so happy in it."

Raven looked at the photo: It showed her with the age of seven. She was in the park leaning at a tree while holding the hand of her father. She could clearly remember the day. It had been taken after a month of Josh's birth. And although Raven hadn't wanted to admit, she had been jealous. So, her father had taken her out. Just the two of them. Raven could still remember how happy and carefree she was on this day. Never had she thought that one day, she would never be able to hold her father's hand anymore. Never had she thought that her life would be anything else than happy. Never had she thought that somebody she wouldn't be able to smile anymore.

Richard stared intensively at the dark woman next to him. He saw the tears which were never able to escape from her eyes in fear of losing control. He saw the pain in her heart. And Richard whished he could do anything to help her. Anything so that she would trust again. Anything so that she could smile again. Anything to make her happy.

There was just one thing he could do.

While he leaned his head towards hers, the logical part of his mind screamed at him to stop, turn away and leave her. And although he knew that with this action he would hurt her more than she already was, he couldn't help himself.

Suddenly and without any warning, Raven felt his lips on hers and to her surprise … she didn't mind it.

He smiled and gently brushed her lips with his own, once, twice, before settling in and letting her grip him tight to prolong the moment. His lips were soft and warm and she could feel her whole body pressing onto his.

And then suddenly and without any warning, clothes were tossed aside and nails dug into firm delicate flesh as their worlds and heated figures collided. Eyes shut tightly closed as hands searched blindly with a need and passion, Raven only could describe it as something primal.

But she didn't mind it at all. She wanted to feel him. She wanted to give herself to him, into him. They moved in unison as they blew all cautions in the wind.

The springs of the mattress below them yielded to the urgent rhythm of their bodies. Soft panting and breathy moans added percussiveness to the constant low squeaking of the bed.

Their eyes locked intensely while they both pushed themselves deeper, harder, and faster; until everything went white.

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_**A/N: **So, tell me, how did you like it…? Not my best chapter, but… yeah…_

_I wanted to thank everybody who had reviewed for the last chapter… you guys are the best and you reviews make me always so happy… and I need a lot of happiness in my life… so, thank you very, very, very, very, very, very much!_

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_Ok, now something entirely else: I decided to make a challenge (can you say that?)… _

_I want you guys to write RaeRob or RaeSpeedy or RaeCy or TerraRob – one shot, but you have to use one of the following lines:_

'**_Love is like chocolate, you can't get enough of it!'_**

_**'A hero doesn't cry!'**_

'_**Will you be here for all eternity?'**_

'**_And his scent was like the scent of life.'_**

'**_Silence is safe. That much he knew.'_**

_So, one of these lines have to appear in your story… and the pairing has to be one of the ones mentioned above… okay…?_

_The first price will be a story written by me… just for you. You can choose if you want me to write a one-shot or a chaptered story… you tell it, I'll do it…_

_The date when the challenge will end is at the end of January… I think…_

_So, I want at least five entries for the challenge… please… c'mon, you know, you want to…_

_If one of you decided to take part in the challenge then mention that you wrote your story for my challenge in your summary and send me a message or a mail telling me about your story… _

_Ok, I hope that many of you will take part in my challenge and I want to read many, many, many stories…_

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_Yeah… that is it from me… for now…_

_Until next chapter…_

_Alena_


	7. not?

_**A/N: **It's another chapter… I'm not really in the mood for saying much… read the end author's notes for the reason…_

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_Thanks, kudos, love and kisses to my wonderful, awesome, lovely, kind beta and friend **Cherry Jade**… I love ya girl… love you  
very much…_

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_**Dedicated to everyone who reviewed and read this story and supported me… you are all the best readers and reviewers a girl can ask for… really…**_

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_**Disclaimer: **Not mine… still… not mine, maybe I'll have more luck this year…?_

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**_Chapter Seven:_**

… **_Not?_**

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Richard lay wide awake in Raven's bed staring at the dark woman lying next to him. Her head rested on his shoulder. Once again he was taken aback by her intriguing beauty and grace. Richard gently brushed a lock of her smooth violet hair off her face only to see her serene and sleeping face.

It was a mistake. Last night – it was a mistake.

He never should have done that. It went too far and now, Raven would be the one to pay for his mistake.

How could he be so stupid, so careless to let that happen?

_You love her, that's why _his inner voice told him.

He chuckled sadly at his own thoughts. He loved her, that's true. But the only way to show his love for her was to sleep with her and endanger her life. Either that or breaking her heart.

No matter what he decided to do next, it will break her heart. And once again it would be his fault that she would have to endure hurt.

Richard's gaze drifted again to the dark beauty. She was beautiful, intelligent, sarcastic, mysterious – she was a goddess. He loved her - truly and deeply.

"Richard …" he heard her muttering in her sleep.

Richard shook his head once and than again to clear his mind. He had to go. He couldn't stay here. He had to leave. Leave her bed, leave her house, leave her life, leave her.

It had bee a fatal idea to move here at all. He had to leave before she could learn the whole truth, before she would be hurt more.

Richard silently crawled out of the bed. Searching for his discarded clothes he walked through her room. Finally, putting on his boxers, jeans and his shirt, Richard looked at Raven and bend down his head; he placed her kiss on her forehead.

Carefully he patted to the door, hoping and praying that she won't wake up. He had to be gone before the morning comes. He couldn't –

"Richard?"

_Don't turn around. Just leave. Don't turn around!_

"Richard?" He could feel her confused eyes on his back. No, he couldn't leave her like that. He had to look at her – see her wonderful eyes.

Slowly he turned away from the door only the most wonderful sight ever. There she was: Her hair tousled and sticking in every direction, a blanket was around her body covering her wild and exotic curves. She seemed a bit flushed and her amethyst eyes were sleepy but looked at him confused and questioning.

"Richard?" she said for the third time and her eyes asked every question she couldn't pose openly.

"I-"

_Yeah, I what? What do you want to tell her? That you love her but that you are the reason that- _

Richard shook his head to get rid of these thoughts.

"I-" he began again. He could tell her the truth – the whole truth. She would understand and then they had a chance to be happy or?

Who was he kidding, she would hate him and she had every right to. The truth would hurt her only more.

There was just one way – one way to end this.

"Raven, I-" but before he could finish his sentence she was standing in front him, the blanket tightly around her petite body.

Her small hands were cupping his face bending his hand down, Raven placed a small, soft kiss on his lips. He stared in her eyes confused but kissed her back nonetheless.

This was not the Raven he had come to learn and love. She was opening up. This sweet, intimate gesture was more a proof for her love than any passionate night could ever be.

Raven loved him. She loved him … and he loved her. It was that simple and yet it wasn't.

What should he do?

Richard's eyes searched hers for an answer but what he found there was breaking his heart. Instead of her usual dull, sallow eyes, they were now filled with affection, warmth, hope and … love?

His arms arched to hold her small frame and he decided to give in to his desires and he pulled her close to his chest. The blanket glided down from her body and she was left in all her naked glory.

Richard felt her soft breasts pressing on his chest, smelling her intoxicating scent; he wished they could stay like that forever. Forever in his arms, there would be no harm to her; there would be no hurt, no pain for her to endure.

He slowly entangled himself from her and looked at her – at her soft, ivory body. She was beautiful, breath-taking beautiful. He had never seen anything more … beautiful and wonderful. He couldn't stop his eyes from rooming all over her exposed body. Finally, his eyes rested on her face to see a pink tint gracing her cheeks.

He smirked and hoped, she wouldn't notice it.

"Ouch…" he softly growled and rubbed his right arm. "What was that for?" he asked bemused.

"For smirking," she simply replied, but he could clearly see the edges of her lips twitching upwards.

"So, every time I'm with you and I smirk, you'll pinch me?" he questioned.

"Yes or when you laugh or chuckle or smile smugly," she informed him.

"Then maybe I should reconsider being with you," he laughed silently.

He watched her expecting a witty comment but all he could see was her eyes wide in confusion and uncertainness.

"Ra-"

"You'll be with … _me_?" she asked, refusing to believe it. He could clearly see that she was nervous, confused and afraid – afraid of his answer.

"Yes," he said and pulled her again close, intertwining his lips with hers. And as he did this, he knew that he had to find a way to make this work.

He had to tell her the truth soon. But for now he will just be happy and content to have her in his arms and life although it could fall apart soon.

As they broke apart, Richard caressed her cheek lovingly. Holding her close he tried to cherish every moment and feeling.

"And you? Do you want to be with me?" he smiled at her but deep down in his heart he knew that he was as nervous and afraid as Raven was earlier.

She put her index finger on her cheek and bowed her head to the right pretending to think about his question.

"I don't know. I mean, after all you came into my room without asking, you looked through my personal stuff without asking for permission, you saw the photo from me where I had to wear pink **_and_** I had to endure a night in club full of drunk and pointless people. I'm not sure if I should, after all the humiliation and agony you put me through."

"Humiliation and agony?" he interrupted her speech. "You sure sound like an actress on a soap opera," he chuckled, but he became silent as soon as he saw her eyes narrowing at him.

"Whatever," she dismissed his remark with a wave of her right hand. "But I think I can try to forgive you." And then her lips curled up in a small, sweet smile.

The breath he was holding was released and once again he bended down to give her a small, chaste kiss.

"You know, I should go before you mother comes back and sees us like this. As much she might like me, I don't think she would like to see me with her daughter in this position," he laughed and shook his head.

Raven bit her lips and looked up at the handsome man.

"Raven, is something wrong?" Richard asked her sensing her uneasiness.

"Last night, it was a mistake," she blurted out.

"A mistake?" he repeated unsure about what she wanted to say. Had she not said that she wanted to be with him? Could it be that maybe she would break **_his _**heart.

Raven shook her head wildly. "No, that's not what I meant. I mean, the night it was wonderful but it was too soon. I didn't regret it, but it had been better if we … we had waited. I'm not ready to move that fast," she whispered the last part. What would happen when he didn't think the same?

Richard sighed in relief and smiled broadly. "That's fine with me, Rae," he ducked his head bit waiting for an insult because of the pet-name but as nothing happened he continued. "It's okay; I just want to be with you." He said and ran his hand through her hair.

Raven nodded. He loved her. He really loved her.

"I really should go now." Richard said entangling his hand from her hair.

"Yeah."

He turned to her door. "Richard," Raven said before he went through the door. "We will see each other… tomorrow, right?" She mentally scolded herself. She was sounding like a desperate woman who couldn't live without seeing her boyfriend for a day.

Boyfriend? That sounded … good. Really good, in fact.

Richard turned his head to her and showed her his charming smile. "Of course," he said. "Goodnight Raven." He added before closing the door behind him.

"Night Richard." Raven whispered knowing that he didn't hear her. "I love you!"

* * *

Had he really done the right thing? Was it really right to be with her – to love her? 

Richard shook his head. He shouldn't think about that. He should be happy to have her.

He would love her and nothing could happen to her. He would protect her.

Richard smiled at his new determination and opened the door entering his house.

"Everything will be fine." he said to the darkness and emptiness in his house.

"Do you really think that, **_Robin_**?" a voice haled through the darkness of the house. "Do you really think that you could escape me?"

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_**A/N: **So, how did you like it…? Too fluffy wasn't it…? What can I do? I'm a sucker for fluff…_

_But tell me, was it that bad…?_

_Review and tell me… I love to read your reviews and they make me happy and smile…_

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_

_Now to something entirely else…_

_I'm really sad to say that I'm thinking about leaving this site… yeah…_

_It's just that, so many RaeRob authors/authoress already left and somehow it as if StarRob fans are running around flaming RaeRob authors/authoresses for their stories and insulting their writing style… which is sad… really sad…_

_Not to forget that I think that the shipping war is going out off hand… and I'm just tired of seeing everybody I befriend and loved to read their stories leaving or quitting writing on this site…_

_So, basically, I'm not sure anymore if I should continue… maybe I just need a new motivation… or I'm just too depressed to think clearly… just not sure…_

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_Anyway, I just wanted to ask you to check out the wonderful stories for my challenge… so many awesome authors/authors took part in my challenge and wrote a story, but I had to see that most of them didn't get the attention/reviews they deserved… so, have a look into my Favourite stories list and check them out… read them, review them and love them… they are really, really good and wonderful…_

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_So, until next chapter…_

_Love…_

_Alena_


	8. Little Bird

_**A/N: **Uhm… yeah… the next chapter… I'm not really sure what to say more… so, enjoy the next chapter…_

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_Many thanks and kudos to my wonderful, awesome, talented beta **Cherry Jade!**_

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_**Dedicated **to everyone who had reviewed and supported me…_

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_**Disclaimer: **I don't own the Teen Titans or the "Little Bird Song" by Jewel… or anything else for that matter…_

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_**Chapter Eight:**_

_**Little Bird**_

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_**Last chapter:**_

_Had he really done the right thing? Was it really right to be with her – to love her?  
Richard shook his head. He shouldn't think about that. He should be happy to have her.  
He would love her and nothing could happen to her. He would protect her.  
Richard smiled at his new determination and opened the door entering his house._  
"_Everything would be fine!" he said to the darkness and emptiness in his house._

"_Do you really think that, **Robin**?" a voice haled through the house._

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* * *

_

Richard tensed and swallowed hard. Every muscle in his body contracted. He felt as if he would explode any moment from the hot anger which immediately swept his body.

"**_You!_** Where are you? Show your face!" Richard spat out desperately drying to make out any moves in the darkness of the house.

A bark of cold laughter could be heard. "You surely are not as good as you used to be."

Richard leaped at the direction the voice was heard only to be greeted my more darkness and emptiness. "Why are you here?" he asked as he wandered through the dark living room to find a clue where the man could be.

**

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Raven looked stood in front of the mirror in her room and looked at her reflection, searching for a difference from her usual self. There has to be something which had changed.

Raven felt as if the change in her heart, in her soul had to be reflected by her appearance.

Maybe her eyes? Did they look different? As the saying goes 'Eyes are the window to the soul'.

Shouldn't they reflect her soul's happiness?

Or maybe her hair? Raven's hands wandered to her long violet her hair tugging some strands behind her ears. Could her heart's spark cause them to be shinier?

Raven shook her head. She was acting childish. Why should anything about her change? Just because she felt happy since the suicide of her father, just because she was able to open her heart, just because – for the first time – she felt as if her life was worth living.

"Argh! I'm really mutating to a crazy, lovey-dovey girl." She muttered and turned away from her pier glass only to find the small form of her little sister standing at the door frame of her room.

Raven smiled at Mira. "Can't sleep?" she asked and gestured the little girl to her bed.

Mira only nodded her head and crawled into Raven's bed and waited until Raven did the same.

Once settled down, Mira tucked at Raven's shirt and looked at her with her big, green eyes.

"Do you want me to read you something?" Raven asked and Mira shook her head.

"Shall I … sing?" Raven used to hate to sing. Yes, she had sung when she was younger. She had sung when her father had lived. Singing meant sharing emotions. With a song you could express all the feelings you were not able to express openly. A song is something personal, something deep. Raven had never felt something to share – until today, until Richard came along and now she felt as if a song would be a good idea.

Mira smiled slightly and once again nodded her head.

Raven sighed and leaned her head against her soft pillow. A song – she searched her head for a song.

And then it came to her. A song her father used to sing to her when she was small. She had never really understood what the song meant when she was younger but now, she perfectly understood.

Her voice trembled when she began to softly chant the song:

_There's a little bird  
Somebody sent down to Earth  
To live along the wind  
Blowing on the wind  
And she sleeps on the wind  
This little bird, somebody sent_

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You know exactly why I'm here." The voice answered. "Did you really think I would not find you?" Another roll of sardonic laughter could be heard. "You are too practicable, Robin – to move to Jump City. Hilarious. And then to buy the house next to them."

"Shut up and show yourself. Or are you afraid?" Richard yelled. He had to found him and bring him down. But he was clearly shorthanded with the darkness surrounding him.

The voice continued without reacting to Richard. "But the best is that you actually fell in love with **_her_**." The voice chuckled. "I thought you would be more intelligent. To begin an affair with the da-"

"Shut up!" Richard roared lunched to the direction of the voice but one again he was only greeted with nothing-ness. He ran towards the wall of his living room and searched the wall for the light switch. He let out a sigh of relief as he found it. But the sigh of relief turned into a roar of frustration as he recognized that the light didn't work.

"Robin, Robin, Robin, did you really think that I would come unprepared?" the man asked. "So, tell me, how was it to fuck the little bird? Was she worth it? Was she good?"

Richard could feel hot breath on his neck and he quickly spun around, his fist clenched, ready to kill the man. One more wouldn't matter.

And indeed, his fist connected with a nose and he could feel a warm liquid running along his fist. The feeling of satisfaction was creeping through his spine – satisfaction and thrill. Something inside him struggled to break free.

Unknown to Richard a satisfied smile crept onto his face. "So, I was right. You still enjoy the feeling of blood on your hands, don't you Robin?" the voice snarled into his ears and Richard once again let his fist fly into his face. "I see you do! You love the feeling of thrill and ecstasy running through your whole body, don't you Robin. You can't help yourself but you love it. You **_want_** to feel blood on your hands, don't you?"

* * *

_Light and fragile  
And feathered sky blue  
Thin and graceful  
The sun shining through  
She flies so high up in the sky  
Way out of reach of human eyes_

* * *

Richard roared and screamed and leaped and punched and hit the man in front who – despite the hits and punches – seemed totally unfazed. 

"Did you really think you could run away, Robin?" the man asked as Richard let his fist fall at his eyes.

Panting heavily, the young man looked at the older man in front of him. "What. Do. You. Want?" Richard demanded.

"As I said, you know what I want. I-"

"No," Richard screamed. "I won't. Never again."

"What a pity," the man spoke with his cold voice. "Then, maybe I should visit your little girlfriend. I have to give you credit for your nice taste. She is beautiful and she sure has a nice body." He laughed at the enraged expression on the young man's face. Everything was going according to his plan. "Do you think she would mind if I would visit her?"

Richard seethed. His fists clenched and unclenched several times. He glared at the man with so much hatred he could muster. "If you just lay a finger on her, I-"

"You what? Will you kill me?" The man laughed.

"Yes, I will!" Richard said between clenched teeth.

"Tsk, tsk, tsk. And here I was thinking that you wanted to change your life. As it seems I was wrong." He walked a little closer but Richard didn't flinch back. "But then again, nobody can escape what is in his blood, can he? Nobody can change his destiny." The man moved closer until he was just mere centimetres away from Richard. "And believe me Robin, this is your destiny. Your only destiny. You went too far to turn back. You will be forever a –"

Richard screamed before the man could finish his speech. "No," he whispered. "No!" he said louder. "NO!" Richard finally screamed. "I changed and I won't go back."

"You will, Robin. You will." The man steel cold voice tickled Richard's ear. "It would be a shame if your girlfriend's beautiful face would be harmed, wouldn't it." He chuckled. "Or, what would your little bird do if she knew the truth about you. Would she still love you? Would she still stay with you?"

* * *

_Light and fragile  
And feathered sky blue  
Thin and graceful  
The sun shining through_

* * *

The man had struck a nerve. Richard's eyes widened. He burnt with anger and self-loath. He felt so desperate like never before in his life before. 

What should he do? He had no other choice than to oblige or Raven would be the one to pay for him.

He should have come to Jump City. It had been better if he had stayed in Gotham.

"So?" The man asked an eyebrow arching.

Richard just nodded; his eyes fixed at the man's face.

"I knew you couldn't resist my offer." The mysterious man smirked and from seemingly nowhere he let appear a file and threw it at Richard's feet. "This is your first mission. I want it to be fulfilled within a week. If not, I have to break a Raven's wings."

Before Richard could say anything, the man had disappeared with flash of light.

* * *

_And the only time that she touches ground  
Is when that little bird, little bird  
Is when that little bird, little bird  
Is when that little bird, little bird…_

* * *

Richard dropped on his knees and felt something warm crashing onto his hands. He lifted his right hand to his cheek and felt the tears streaming down. The tears felt so strange, so alien. 

He had lost – once again he had lost.

Lost his dignity and soul.

_Is when that little bird dies_

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_**A/N: **Another chapter finished… and only two more before the new chapters… at least for the one who read the story before it got deleted…_

_Just for you to know: I intentionally left out the identity of the man. It will be revealed soon. _

_The same goes with Richard's/Robin's past - although, I left enough clues to for you to guess._

_The italic lines are the parts Raven is singing to her sister. It's "Little bird song" by Jewel. It's more a Lullaby than a song._

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_Ok, I wanted to thank everyone who reviewed the last chapter and the whole story… thank you so very, very, very, very much and… I just love you all… in purely platonic way, of course  
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_:grins:_

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So, goodbye… for now…**_

_**Take care… be safe…**_

_**Love, Alena**_


	9. Fallen Through

_**A/N: **It's the next chapter - finally…_

_Haven't changed much… it's particularly the same as last time…_

_A short warning before you read this chapter: This chapter is really, really fluffy and cheesy… so, if you can't stand fluff and cheesy scenes, I would advice you to not read this chapter…_

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_Thanks and kudos to my awesome, wonderful and great beta and friend **Cherry Jade**…_

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_Dedicated to: **Cherry Jade **and **Daybreak25 **and **Mind Shadow **and _**_SweetNCrazieSugarmuffin_**_and _**_Raven of the Night676_**_and _Kikiks_and **Tecna**… because they are all so awesome and wonderful and supportive and great… and so much more…_

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_**Disclaimer: Not mine!**_

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_**Chapter Nine:**_

_**Fallen Through**_

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_**Knock, knock**_

Bolting up on the couch, Richard awoke. There was something. He was sure he heard something.

_**Knock, knock**_

There – there was it again.

The door.

Someone was at the door.

He could ignore whoever was on the door and continue sleeping. After last night that was exactly what he needed. He wasn't in the mood to see anybody.

_**Knock, knock.**_

Richard growled. Whoever was at the door, it was sure that the person wouldn't give up. If this is what the person wanted. Richard marched to the door. He would make sure that whoever dared to disturb would get all of his anger. He opened the door rather violently. Ready to scream his lungs off, he opened his mouth as he actually saw **_who _**standing in front of him.

His eyes wandered over the body of the figure. He saw shapely legs clad in a blue-jeans and a slender yet voluptuous body in a dark-green tank-top. Lastly, Richard's eyes rested on beautiful face with enchanting amethyst eyes and matching long, dark-violet hair.

"Raven?" He asked hoarsely, unsure why his voice was quivering.

Maybe it was the fact that she was the most beautiful person he had ever seen or the fact that he truly loved her no matter what it was, but he had the sudden urge to hold her in his arms forever and never let her go.

"Uh, hey …" Raven nervously said, bending one leg at the knee and trying to hide behind herself.

Richard could hear her voice wavering, he couldn't hold on any longer. He pulled her small form towards himself. Throwing his arms around her, he closed the door and held her close for a moment. He could feel her stiffen for a mere second before completely melting in his embrace.

Bending his head towards hers, he kissed her lightly.

He was glad to have her in his arms where she was safe. At least for now. But he would do everything to make sure that she would stay safe. Everything!

"Hey," He smiled at her and placed a small kiss on her nose.

Nose wrinkled and face flushed, she looked up at him. "What was that for?" she questioned as he led her to the kitchen where she perched herself on an island stool.

Turning her back to her to put a kettle on the stove, he answered. "For nothing," he turned to her. "Do I need a reason to show affection for my girlfriend?"

Raven shook her head shyly. "No, I don't think so."

Richard smiled and took a place next to her. "So, why are you here?" He asked.

She looked at him with mischief shinning in her eyes. "Do I need a reason to visit _my_ boyfriend?" She said mockingly.

"No, I don't think so." He said echoing her words from earlier.

Raven just shook her head. "You know, actually there is a reason why…" Raven trailed off as Richard's hand gently creased her cheek. It was not the caressing which left her speechless. She grabbed his hand, staring at it concerned.

"Richard, you-"

Realizing why Raven acted so strangely, he quickly withdrew his hand from her gentle grip.

"It's nothing," he said as nonchalantly as possible.

"You've got blood on your hand. How can you say it's nothing?" She asked, worry clearly evident in her voice.

"I … just hurt myself. That's all nothing to be worried about." He spoke as he wet a cloth at the sink and wiped away the blood on his hand.

Mentally he cursed himself for his stupidity. How could he forget such a thing? How could he let her see that? He did not change, nor clean up since the encounter with …

"It was dry!" Raven's voice pierced through his unpleasant thoughts.

He looked, unsure about what she was talking. "The blood, it was dry." Her amethyst eyes were locked with his azure orbs, searching for an answer in them.

"I cut myself last night when I came home. I didn't pay attention and I dropped a glass. After cleaning up, I was too tried to clean up myself, I think," he lied eloquently without blinking.

But he could still see and feel her worry and doubt. "Last night was just too straining, you know." He added teasingly and winked at her. And the comment brought the aimed affect: Raven blushed profusely, pinching him lightly on his arm.

He grinned wickedly and ruffled her hair playfully. "What? Is my little Raven blushing?"

Raven's response was a light growl with another pinch. Laughing loudly, he took her in his arms and rested his chin on top of her head. "This relationship is getting too abusive. I don't think you're healthy for me." He teased her and felt her face burying deep into his chest.

It almost frightened him how perfect she fitted in his arms.

And as he held her close, he asked himself if this was what everybody called "true love". Was this overwhelming feeling what his mother had prophesied him when he was a small child?

Could it be that he – as cliché as it may sound – had found his soul mate?

Deep down in his heart, Richard knew the answer to all of this.

He loved her.

He loved Raven.

'_And because you love her, you are lying to her.' _

'_I have no other choice. I have to.'_

'_There is always another choice: Tell her the truth.'_

'_She won't understand. She will get hurt.'_

'_That's not what you fear the most.'_

'_She will leave me if I tell her everything and then I'm alone again.'_

'_You will hurt her more with your lies. Tell her everything. She won't leave you.'_

'_How..?'_

'_Tell her the truth!'_

Richard shook his head and slowly pulled Raven's body away from him.

Finally, they said simultaneously.

"Raven …"

"Richard …"

They stopped.

Then they tried again, once more speaking at the same time, "You first—" They shared a nervous laugh

"You go first," Richard offered with a smile.

"Richard … I … just wanted to thank you." She said and he looked at her astonished but she silenced him with a soft glance. "I don't know how to explain it, but … you changed me. And not only me. You changed my whole family. Yesterday, was the first time … since … since the death of my father that I felt truly happy. Yesterday, was the first time I saw my mother smiling – smiling sincerely, not her fake laughs. You made Josh happy, you made Mira happy and you made **_me _**happy. There is so much I want to tell you, so much I can't put into words." She titled her head to have a better look on him. "But Richard, there is still this fear. This fear that I … I will lose you. The fear that you will leave me just like … like … my father." At the last part, she intertwined her fingers with his. "Richard, I … I love you."

'_But Richard, there is still this fear. This fear that I … I will lose you. The fear that you will leave me just like … like … my father.' _Her words kept spinning in Richard's head and everything he wanted to say was stuck in his throat.

How could he tell her the truth when it would break her heart? He closed his eyes leaning to her, kissing her.

Pulling back he whispered to her slightly parted lips. "Raven, I will never leave you,"

'_Liar, liar!' _His mind yelled at him. Blocking out the unwanted voice, he continued. "I love you Raven. I … I love you and I will do everything to make you happy. I … I will be always there for you."

Kissing her again, he buried his hand in her violet locks before pulling away from her.

And what he saw made his heart ache in mixture of love and pain: Her delicate lips were curled into one of her rare, sweet and serene smile. But the more he thought about it, the more he realized that her smile wasn't as rare as they used to be. At least when she was with him, and he knew that her smile was the most beautiful gift, she could give him.

"I love you!" He declared again in all honesty and with all the love he felt for her.

"Good to know," she smirked. "You know, Garfield invited me to his place to have breakfast. Uhm … do you maybe … want to come along?" She asked, nervously chewing on her lower lip. She didn't know why, but she felt really self-conscious asking him to come with her – although he was her boyfriend. She just wasn't used to such things.

"Sure," he flashed her one of his heart-melting smiles. "Just let me change my clothes." Grinning slyly, he said. "You can come and watch me if you want to." And before Raven could pinch him, he was off to his room, but he could hear such words as "pervert" and "jerk" haling behind him.

He proceeded to ascend the stairs to his room as his eyes fell onto a file, lying on the floor. His eyes darkened and Richard felt every muscle and every fibre of his body tense.

'_I knew you couldn't resist my offer.' The mysterious man smirked and from seemingly nowhere he let appear a file and threw it at Richard's feet. "This is your first mission. I want it to be fulfilled within a week. If not, I have to cut a Raven's wings." '_

He had completely forgotten about the file. He just hadn't thought about it anymore. He thought he could find a way out of it. But now that he promised Raven to never leave her side anymore, how was he supposed to find a way out of it?

Richard struggled with himself as he picked up the file. He had to do it. He couldn't risk Raven's life. He couldn't live without her.

He let his eyes wander over the super scribed paper.

The temperature of Richard's body dropped, cold sweat erupted over the entirety of his skin. Swallowing hard, he felt panic stirring in his gut. "No," he whispered to himself. "This can't be. This …" The file in his hand fell to the floor again.

His first mission – it was ….

… Garfield Logan.

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_**A/N: **Hey, I told you it would be fluffy and chessy… I warned you…_

_Anyway, leave me a little review and tell me how you liked the chapter… or what you thought wasn't that good… or what I can improve… just review… okay…? (Yep, I'm a review whore…)_

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_Before saying goodbye for now, I wanted to tell you about two challenges…_

_The first challenge is from the wonderful and talented authoress **Daybreak25 **_and it's called _**'**__**The Wings of Flight Challenge'… **and I'm one of the judges who will decided who'll win…_

_Second challenge is from a wonderful and talented authoress as well, _**_EmaniaHilel_****_…_**

_If you want to know more about these two challenges PM the authoresses who are provinding the challenge **OR** PM me **OR** tell me in your reviews that you want to know more about the challenge/challenges and I'll send you a PM and give you the information **OR **visit the following forum: http / www . / fr / 380118/7592/75682/1/ Of course without the spaces and scroll down until you find the post where the information about the challenges are…_

_I would be really, really happy if you would take up the challenges, bcause not only is it fun and helps you to improve your writing skills, but it would make the authoresses who are provinding the challenge happy…_

_So, c'mon just let your creativity flow and write something… I'm sure it will be awesome… and jhust for you to know, I'll take up the _**_EmaniaHilel_**_**'s **challenge as well. _

_Since I'm a judge for **Daybreak25's **challenge, I can't really take up the challenge, but I will still write a story with the given rules… as a encouragment for you to join as well…_

_Just think about it… okay…?_

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_Anyway, that was it from me… for now…_

_Take care and be safe…!_

_Love, Alena_


	10. Bloody Destiny

_**A/N: **Yeah, I finally decided to update on of my stories…_

_I know, I'm lazy and really slow, but my life is really complicated right now, so bear with me…_

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_Thanks and kudos to** ChaiChi **for beta-ing this chapter… thank you very, very, very, very much… you are truly awesome…_

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_Dedicated to **Cherry Jade**, because she is going through a hard time right now and I wish her all the best._

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_**Disclaimer: I don't own them!**_

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**_Chapter Ten:_**

_**Bloody Destiny**_

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"You are nervous," Raven stated as she and Richard entered a luxurious apartment-complex.

"I'm not nervous!" Richard said defensively and they waited for the lift.

"You are!" she teased

"I'm not!" he growled back.

"You are!"

"Am not!"

"Are too!"

"Am not!"

"Are too!"

"A-" He stopped himself before he could say it again. "You know that we sound like three year old kids?" Richard asked and they entered the lift.

"Yeah, I know," she answered and smiled. "But you **_are _**nervous."

"I'm no-" Richard sent her a glare and grunted something incoherently.

"What? I couldn't really catch that?"

Richard sighed. "Yes, you are right, I am nervous," he admitted as they walked out of the lift. Raven grabbed his arm, pulling him to the side.

"You don't have to be nervous, you know," she said, looking into his blue eyes. "It will be only Gar and Kori. You already meet them and they like you, believe me."

Richard sighed again. "Yes, they know me, but only as your annoying neighbor and not as your boyfriend. It's different now. They may have loved me as your neighbor, but what if they don't like me as your boyfriend? What if they think I'm not good enough for you? What if they just hate me?" He said this all in one breath and Raven couldn't help herself but grin.

"If you feel better, you're still annoying," she teased him, attempting to lighten the mood. But as she saw his frown, she gently reached for his right cheek and stroked it gently. "Richard, don't worry. They like you and they will still like you when I tell them that you are my boyfriend. I mean, who wouldn't love you?" She assured him with a wink and tiptoed to give him an innocent kiss on his cheek, before Richard grabbed her wrist and claimed her lips rather passionately.

When he finally let go of her, he flashed her his trademarked lopsided smile. "You are right, nobody can resist my charm." He paused, before adding, "I mean, if I succeeded to melt the ice-princess's heart than… ouch!" Richard traced his lower lip with tongue and looked at the dark woman in front him unbelievingly. "You bit me?" It came out more as a question than a statement.

Raven smirked. "Wow, way to go Einstein."

"You know, if you feel that feisty we can go back to my place, there you can bite as much as you want to," Richard purred into Raven's ear and nibbled on her earlobe.

Raven smacked him playfully on his arm. "Behave!" she ordered. "Are you feeling better?"

"Yes," he said and afterwards added. "Thanks!"

"Anything for my _dahling_." She grinned and Richard was once again amazed by how beautiful she was, before she began trotting towards a particular door.

"Did you just call me dahling?" he asked, creeped out. All he got was a laugh. He jogged next to, as Raven rang the bell.

They heard some faint footsteps from inside and within seconds the door burst open, revealing the tall and handsome Garfield Logan.

Gar smiled happily at Raven, but his smile seemed to shatter into millions of pieces as his eyes caught of Richard standing next to Raven, their hands intertwined.

"H-Hey," Gar hesitantly said.

"Hi, Garfield," Raven greeted back.

"Hey," Richard said asking himself why it seemed as if the air between the three was as thick as ice.

Garfield blinked and gestured them to come inside without saying anything else. He led them to his big kitchen where an overjoyed Kori was already sitting on the table.

"Raven, there you are!" Kori nearly screamed and rushed towards Raven, encircling her in death hug.

"K-Kori… can't breathe," Raven managed to choke out, and Kori let go of her.

"Sorry," She mumbled sheepishly before she caught sight of Richard. "Oh, you brought Richard with you! That's fantastic. You both finally managed to get along?" the red-head excitedly asked – her big smile never wavering.

'_To get along is a nice way to describe our relationship' _Richard thought as he proceeded to answer, but Raven beat him to it.

"Actually, we… um… you know… we…"

Richard grinned and helped his stuttering girlfriend. He loved to see her nervous and flushing, she was just too cute this way – not that he would tell her that. No. God help him, she would probably kill him if he said such a thing to her.

"We are together!" Richard confidently announced and everybody fell silent…

…until Kori leaped for Richard and Raven and hugged them both.

"That's glorious, wonderful! The best news I have heard for a long time." She released and jumped up and down with joy. "You both are so perfect for each other. When did you get together and why didn't you tell sooner? Who asked whom? Did you kiss him or he you? Does your mum know…?" And the question didn't stop.

Richard leaned down to Raven and whispered. "Is this normal and are we supposed to answer?" he asked, somehow creeped out again. He had never seen a person talking so much with such an enthusiasm. It was amazing.

Raven just rolled her eyes.

"You know, you and Richard and me and Roy could go on a double date. That would be wonderful, so ro-"

Raven stopped her before she could continue to babble. "Whatever you want," she said between clenched teeth. "But please stop talking and asking all these questions!"

Kori looked at her for a moment as if she was deeply hurt, before her smile broke out again. "Ok, but you have to tell me everything – later," she said with a wink in her eyes and Richard knew that this wink couldn't mean anything good. He was glad that Raven wasn't the kind of girlfriend who would walk around boasting and telling every juicy detail about their relationship…

"Yeah, later…" Raven winked back, and Richard's eyes widened as he realized that he wasn't that fortunate.

"So… you both are… together now?" Garfield's voice could be heard for the first time since Richard had announced that he and Raven were an item.

Raven smiled a bit and nodded.

"That's cool – really great…" Garfield said and he asked himself if anybody other than him noticed that his voice sounded high-pitched – almost hysterical. He looked around and saw that Kori had dragged Raven to the table, chattering with her about who knows what.

He wanted to look at Richard, but he just couldn't bring himself to do that. Gar feared that he might break down or hit Richard hard and the worst was that he really didn't know why.

Ok, that was a lie, he knew why, but what he didn't know was why Raven didn't know.

Wasn't it obvious that he, Garfield Logan, loved her? But then again how was she supposed to know? He had never told her, never sent her any indications that he felt more than friendship for her. But that was only because he didn't know it himself; he wasn't sure himself. As the saying goes, you never know how much you love something until it's gone, and Raven was gone for him. He knew it – for sure.

He should be happy for her, because **_she _**was **_happy_**. Raven was happy or as happy as she could be. She even smiled. Raven never smiled, giggled, laughed, or teased, but she did it now and he was more than happy to see her smiling, giggling, laughing, and teasing. More than anybody else Raven should be happy, but why did it have to be Richard who made her happy, who made her smile and laugh? Why not him?

He would give up his life for her, Garfield knew that now, and he asked himself why he had spent so many years running after women who he hadn't loved or who hadn't loved him.

Because he was an idiot – a stupid idiot!

"You should have seen her!" Richard laughed and smiled at his girlfriend before turning again towards Kori. "She was totally plastered!" He laughed again. "But I have to say, she makes a good figure on the dance floor, doesn't she, Garfield?" He addressed the man who sat across from him.

The green-eyed man just nodded, unable to say anything.

"That is so not funny," Raven pouted and crossed her arms in front of her chest.

"Oh, it is funny – and you know it," Richard teased her with a cocky grin. "If you excuse me now, I think I need to use the bathroom," he said still smiling and looked at Gar who seemed to be deep in thoughts.

"Oh," Garfield said as he realized that everybody was looking at him. "The bathroom is down the hall on the right side. I can show-"

Richard smiled and shook his head. "Thank you, but I will find it." And with that he stood up from his place and walked down the hall.

Once in the bathroom, he let out a sigh and looked at his reflection in the mirror. "What am I going to do?"

His reflection stared back at him and he asked himself for the hundredth time what had become of him. What had happened that he had to find a solution for not killing a human?

Why - for once – couldn't he be happy? Why couldn't he just enjoy being together with a woman he loved more than anything else?

To complicate things, Richard had realized that Garfield was jealous and in love with Raven. Yes, he did notice that. He was trained to notice such small things and to read the emotions of other people.

Garfield loved Raven.

That could come in handy later. He could use this information to ki-

Richard eyes winded in shook. What was he thinking? What was he doing? He couldn't think such things. He couldn't-

With a bitter burst of laughter, he bent down and splashed icy water against his face. Looking back up, he sighed. When had he begun to become such a monster?

"I don't have time to think about this."

'_You need to'_

"No I don't."

'_You must think about it'_

"Fuck off."

With a sigh, he opened the bathroom door and walked quietly to the kitchen, but before he could enter the kitchen, loud voices caught his attention.

"Friends, please do not argue!" Kori's worried voiced could be heard. Unfortunately from the spot he was standing he couldn't see them, he just heard them.

"No Kori, we have to argue," Raven spoke coldly.

"C'mon Raven, all I said was that you shouldn't trust this Richard so fast. I mean you don't know anything about him, do you?" Garfield argued back, but you could easily make out that he was worried about Raven.

"I know that he loves me, that is enough!" Raven spat out stoically and Richard's heart nearly broke at her words. She trusted and defended him against her friends and he did nothing to deserve that trust and love.

"Raven, don't be so naïve! How can you trust him when you know nothing about him? For all we know he could be a killer!" Garfield spat right back and Richard didn't know if he should laugh or cry at his words. If Garfield only knew how right he was.

"Garfield, don't be so stupid," Raven mocked him. "Do you really think Richard is someone to mistrust?" Her voice was harsh and cold, but it softened on her next words. "Can't you see that he makes me happy? I… I wasn't that happy since… since the death of my father. I... I love him, Gar, I really love him and I want my friends to approve of this relationship." Richard could hear her sigh. "But if you don't, then I have to accept that and go on with my love, but Gar, I won't let Richard walk away from me. No matter what happens. And I don't want you to walk away from me either."

'_Ok, this was the time to make an appearance' _Richard thought and marched as noisily as he managed to the kitchen.

They looked all at him as he entered the kitchen and if he hadn't listened to the conversation from the hall, he still could have guessed that something bad had happened, because everyone in the room looked rather angry or disappointed or sad.

"Uh…" Richard began and his icy blue eyes were fixed on Raven "Has something happened?" he asked as cluelessly as he could manage.

Raven just shook her head and looked from Garfield to Richard. "Nothing has happened," She sighed. "But I think… we should go now. I think you and Josh have another training-session today, haven't you?"

Richard nodded, and before he could protest or say anything else, Raven was already at the door, ready to leave.

He turned to the other two in the room and saw their – especially Garfield's – sad expressions. "Bye then…" Richard said awkwardly and nodded at them.

Kori just waved with a small smile and Garfield ignored him all together.

So, Richard just walked after Raven, knowing that he was responsible for all this mess.

Once outside, Raven threw her arms around Richard and buried her face in his chest. "I love you. You know that, don't you? You will never leave me, will you?" she whispered in his chest desperately.

Shocked at her display of affection in public, he just brought her closer and stroked her hair. "I know, and I love you too! I really do and I will never leave you – never!" The dark-haired man looked to the sky and wondered why his last words tasted like a lie in his mouth.

* * *

_He was alone._

_All of a sudden, bright light hit his face. _

_So bright._

_He tried to cover his face. What was it? And then he looked at his hands as he brought them to his face._

_Blood red._

_They were bloody. _

_Completely covered in the warm liquid._

_It dripped from his fingers as his mouth opened on a scream, but nothing came out._

_He blinked and birds flew around him, white, purest white, doves. The symbol of peace... _

_Yet as they flew towards him, they changed..._

_A black pigment seeped along the spine of their feathers, dying the birds pitch black. _

_Ravens._

_They were now black ravens._

_He watched as they hurtled towards him, seeing without understanding as their sharp beaks dug at his skin._

_"No! No!" he screamed, holding his arms in front of his face. He looked with a detached sense of terror at the pool of blood dripping down. _

_He blinked rapidly as he saw something appear in the puddle before him. _

_A face... red, liquid - a strangely beautiful face with violet hair and amethyst eyes... _

_"Nnnoooooo!" The whine came from his quivering lips as he desperately closed his eyes. _

_Other faces appeared, slowly, pulling themselves out of the blood, becoming three dimensional._

_"NononononononononoNO!" He lunged upwards, thrashing his arms wildly._

_The birds screamed angrily, and black feathers fell down and were sucked into the garnet puddle. _

_xxxxxxxxxxxx _

"Nooooooo!" Richard jerked awake from his nightmare, breathing heavily. His right hand ran through his messy and sweaty hair.

"You always used to have nightmares, didn't you, _Robin_?" A deep and dark voiced reached his ears and Richard flinched slightly before catching himself again. "You always were too weak to endure them." A bark of laughter hailed through the dark and silent night.

"What are you doing here?" Richard asked harshly towards the direction where the voice came from.

"My my, Robin. Aren't you happy to see me again? Here I was thinking that you missed me," the man said with his deep voice.

"What do you want?" he spat out and wished that he could kill him and live his life in peace – just get rid of him.

"Ah, I just wanted to know how your next mission is getting along. I heard that you visited your prey today. Good, I see. You are still as good as you used to be. Getting to know your victim before murdering is the best way to kill them!"

"Shut up!" Richard screamed. "I'm not going to kill him. I won't do it, I-"

"You will, and you know that. I don't think that you would risk the life of your lovely bird," the mysterious man laughed. "By the way, I'm surprised that you aren't with her. You shouldn't leave such a beautiful woman alone, should you? There are many crazy people out there, and who knows what could happen if-"

Richard jerked out of his bed and lunged towards the man, pushing him at the floor. "Tell me, Slade, what holds me back to kill you right now?" he asked between clenched teeth and his hands pressed at Slade's throat.

Despite the fact that he was denied to breathe, the man managed to laugh. "Go ahead. Kill me, Robin! I know you want to do it… C'mon Robin, kill me. Do what you yearn to do! Kill. Me!"

Richard pressed harder on the man's throat. He clutched Slade's neck and saw him struggling. The air was denied exit or entry into Slade's lungs. It felt good seeing the man he hated more than anything else in the world in such a state.

Just bit more pressure and he could kill him. Just a bit and he could live in peace and Raven would be safe and-

Richard let go of the man's throat and pushed himself off of the heavily breathing man.

"I knew you wouldn't be able to kill me. You are weak – too weak, Robin!" Slade said as he stood up and approached Richard. "But since I am such a nice person, I will give you an option to escape the cruel fate of killing your pretty girlfriend's friend." He paused and looked at him under the mask he was wearing. "Come back with to Gotham and your little Raven and her family and friends will be safe. But before you begin to protest, think about everything you would risk by staying here in Jump City. Are you really willing to risk the life of your little Raven, just so you can live happily? Do you really want to cause her more pain and kill one of her friends?" And with these last words Slade disappeared.

Richard stumbled towards the wall, leaning against it. He cocked out in despair, "What am I supposed to do?" But as the words were out of his mouth, he knew what he hast to do.

There was just one option, and it didn't matter that this option would break his heart – and Raven's.

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_**A/N: **This was the last chapter before the new ones are beginning… _

_Yup, next chapter will be a new one and let me tell you that the next chapter will be full of action…_

_Only two or three more chapters and this story will be finished, although I'm not sure if you'll all like the end I have in my mind for this story…_

_Anyway, I wanted to thank everybody who had reviewed the last chapter… you guys are all so wonderful and awesome and just the very best… thank you very much for all the wonderful and encouraging reviews. I can't tell you how much they mean to me…_

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_Oh, before I forget the winners of my challenge will be announced on Friday in my forum, but I'll PM the winners._

_So, don't worry…_

_There will be five or six different winners for five or six different categories… but believe me it wasn't easy to choose the winners…_

_And the prizes will be: A preview for one of my progressing stories OR a one-shot written by me (You give me the summary and the pairing) OR picture drawn by me from your favourite character (It doesn't have to be from the Teen Titans... it can anything you want, but no drawings about pairings, because I really suck at drawing pairings) OR some original and completely out of my mind drawing by me._

_You decide what you want and I'll do it... if I can, of course..._

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So, last, but not least: How did you like this chapter…? Review and tell me… okay…? I really want to know… so, pretty, pretty please leave me a small review..._

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That was it from me… for now…_

_Love, Alena_


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